Lashton one Shots

There for you

Prompt: not really sure but this is kinda "sad"? I guess. I don't know for sure lol.

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Ashton was never fond of himself. He didn't really enjoy his smile or seeing himself in a mirror. He didn't know why. It's been a long time since he's thought of himself like this. Why start now? Well maybe, it had something to do with people calling him fat? Ugly? Disgusting? He wasn't really sure. He never pays attention to any of the hate, so why would he start.

He didn't tell Luke, his boyfriend, that he started feeling this way again. He knows Luke would never agree with anything he thinks he is, which one of the reasons why he loves him. But he doesn't want to tell him what he thinks of himself.

As of right now, the two were in their shared apartment and Luke was in the kitchen putting away some things the couple just bought, while Ashton was in the bathroom in their bedroom. He was leaning against the bathroom sink countertop and looking at himself in the mirror. His palms were against the counter with some of his fingers gripping the edge. He squinted his eyes at his reflection and tried to find something even slightly attractive about himself. He had so such luck so he just stood there and stared at himself.

He heard Luke come into the bedroom but didn't turn to look at him. From the corner of his eye, Ashton saw Luke walk to the doorway of the bathroom and lean against the frame. Neither one of them said anything nor made a move.

That is, until Luke broke the silence.

"I know what you're thinking Ash," he got no response from Ashton. "Please stop. You're nothing you think you are." Again Ashton says nothing causing Luke to sigh. He pushed himself off of the frame and came up behind Ashton and wrapped his arms around Ashton's petite waist and buried his face in Ashton's shoulder.

"I know what's been going through your mind lately. I've seen the way you look at yourself when you think I'm not looking. I know that you've been trying to hide it, I know that you don't like me worrying about you. But you know I always worry about you. You know I always worry about if I'm doing the right thing, if I'm making you happy, if you're happy. You know that I'm like that." Luke said into Ashton's shoulder, kissing his shoulder every now and then.

"I don't know why this started now." Ashton mumbled quietly as he leaned into Luke's embrace.

"It's ok," Luke said against Ashton's shoulder, "Lets go sit down on the bed yea? We can talk." Ashton nodded slightly and Luke picked him up bridal style, carrying him to the bed. He sat down with Ashton on his lap, Ashton's head buried in the crook of his neck.

"So," Luke started, "do you want to tell me what's going on in your head? What kind of thoughts are floating around at the moment?" Luke spoke soothingly while running his hands up and down Ashton's back.

Ashton shrugged, "I'm fat. I'm not good enough. My smile is ugly, I hate looking at my reflection in the mirror. I'm scared. Scared I'm not good enough, scared that you'll leave me, scared to tell you what's going on in my head cause I think you'll hate me. I'm scared Lukey." He said, whimpering at the end.

"Hey, it's ok to be scared. I get scared all the time. Do you know of what?" Luke asked as he looked down at Ashton. "What?" Ashton croaked.

"I'm scared of losing you. I know that you feel sad sometimes and that scares me. I know that you've dealt with depression in the past and had a hard life but I know you managed to get through that. And I'm scared that now, since you're dealing with this, it's scares me that I could lose you." Luke explains, kissing Ashton's forehead softly.

"I was scared if I told you, you wouldn't have been there for me if I needed you to be." Ashton said quietly as he looked at his hands, which were in his lap.

Luke sighed, tilting Ashton's head so he would look him in the eyes, "Ashton, I will always be there for you if you need me. If you cry, I'll be there for you. If you're hurt, I'll be there for you. If you are ever going through anything, and you need a shoulder to cry on, I'll be there for you. No matter what, I'm always here for you. Always. Always and forever." Luke assures Ashton, his eyes never leaving Ashton's hazel ones.

"You mean that?" Ashton asked timidly, his hand coming to rest on top of Luke's, which was cupping Ashton's right cheek.

"Of course I mean that," Luke pecks Ashton's lips quickly, "I'll be there whenever you need me. Ok? Come to me with whatever. I don't care if you're upset about something that happened online, in real life, on the other part of the world, come to me. I'm here for you, ok baby? I love you ash." Luke leaned in, as did Ashton, and their lips touched. They kissed for a few moments before they pulled away for a breather.

"I love you too Luke." Ashton said. Luke smiled fondly before he laid them both down and pulled the covers over them. Luke wrapped his arms around Ashton's waist, providing a protective aura to wrap itself around Ashton. He closed his eyes feeling safe and happy for the first time in a long time.

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A/n- HEY GUYS, so this wasn't the original planned one shot but I forgot what I actually was gonna do for this title so I wrote this.

This is a short a/n and one shot but I'm gonna post a note in like a few minutes. Plz read it, it would be greatly appreciated

-Lyd 💙