this is everything i didn't say

thirty-three

and we'll never forget, will we? we won't ever forget because fifteen years from now remnants of the fears we have now, of not being good enough for whoever we're with, will resurface.
we'll never forget because we've got the scars to remind us and we have to live with what we did whether it be discolorations from scratches or big swollen scars because we were young and didn't know how to deal with pain
we'll never forget because we still have hearing damage from when we were teenagers and we used to turn up our music too loud to drown out our minds and spend entire days with our earbuds in blocking out the world
maybe the damage left behind won't be as noticeable to some but we'll never forget how we felt when we were young because we carry our memories on our skin and in our messed up hearing and in our old piles of worn-out black clothes and the too-many bracelets we wore to hide our insecurity from the world
we're never going to forget