i am absolutely terrified that i am going to lose you because i wasn't enough for the last person to stick around and so now how am i ever going to be enough to keep you alive? my nerves are absolutely shot and i flinch when my phone buzzes and earlier my hands shook and sometimes i can't even sleep because i'm so scared of what you might do to yourself. i'm scared i'll never see you again. scared that instead of waking up to your good morning snap, one day i'll wake up to your suicide note. that one day i won't be able to keep you here any longer, because no one else seems to be doing crap and i hate that i can't fix your sadness.
i am trying the best i can and i just hope it's enough because this is the first time i've ever tried to save someone i love and sure i've talked strangers on the internet out of things like this, but it's a million times more terrifying when you've got someone you care about on the other line saying they want to give up and you can only do so much to stop them
please stick around. for me. for yourself. for whatever you can grasp onto. i can't wait to see your smile on may first when i tell you that you did it, you made it, you survived. i can't wait for you to see how proud of you i'm going to be. can't wait for you to see the gift i have planned for you.
we just need to get there.
//HOLD ON TILL MAY//
YOU ARE READING
this is everything i didn't say
Poetryand then there was one //if you know me, please ask before reading this, it's very personal
