Thrown Inside (One Direction Fanfiction)

Chapter ThirtyNine - Life Is Short, Sweet and Confusing

When I woke up pain was shooting from left to right. Simply I did what any other person would've done. I screamed. The pain was throbbing over my body. A nurse came running in. I hadn't seen her before. She examined the struggling me. She started tapping on the machine next to me and my screams died down.

So was the rest of the world. It went black.

This repeated itself six times that Night. Still It was one of the best sleeps I had got in a real long time. I really don't know why this was but I was Happy about it. 

The seventh time I woke up I was not in pain. Lilly was standing by my side. The crocked eyebrows was back which sended chills down my spine. This meant bad news. 

"Good Morning Emma" She whispered and gave me a small smile. I sat up in my bed slowly making sure the pain wasn't going to come back. Lilly turned around moving a chair to the bed and sat down in it. I placed my hands in my lap waiting for the news.

"This night you've had six seizures" She said. Was that what that was? I didn't want to have that again. "We don't know what caused it but we think it's the tumors" She said and I nodded. "We are going to put you on some ant seizure medicine that will hopefully make you stop having them" She explained and I took a deep breath. "We have also decided that it's for the best if we do operate tonight and try get as much of the tumors out" She said and I looked at her. Scared for my life of course. 

I don't want to die. I don't want to do this. But of course it was necessary. All was. Slowly I gave her a nod. 

"Could we wait until Niall get's here? I don't want to be in surgery when He gets here" I said and she nodded. "Of course... We will schedule it for three o'clock and if he's not here we will change the time... Okay?" She asked and stood up. I nodded. "Thank you Dr. Jones" I said and she laughed. "You're welcome Emma" Lilly said and walked out of the door. 

As it closed I felt alone. My phone was of the charts with texts and missed phone calls. I couldn't bother picking any of them up. I started painting. Something I haven't done in a long long while. To long if you ask me. 

Outside the sun started peaking through the clouds and I gave out a little sigh. I started thinking about what was a head of me. Radiation... Chemo... Surgery. Not in that order thought. The possibility of me losing my hair had been confirmed. 

I wasn't scared of losing my hair. I was scared of losing eyelashes and eyebrows. They define you in so many ways that you don't want to be without them. Lilly had explained everything as detailed as possible and gave me tips and she had even told me about how others had experienced it. 

The surgery today would remove a large amount of the tumors. The surgery would take about eight hours and I would be down for nine. I wasn't really scared. When I was fifteen I got surgery on my teeth so I kind of knew what was going to happen. 

After the surgery I would be allowed to heal for three weeks and then I would start Radiation for six weeks and then Chemo. The plan that Lilly had planned out for me would take one and a half year. It felt like such a short amount of time when she explained it but when I got the full time it was a hole another thing. 

I was impressed by how fast everything was moving. From yesterday when I came in to now. Lilly had explained it as that they had caught my cancer so "early" so for me it would be safer if everything got done as quickly as possible. 

Honestly I didn't care enought to look to much into it. After all I wasn't in pain so I trusted them. 

At the moment I was sitting on youtube browsing all these kinds off cancer videos. Just to kind of brace myself from what was coming. Another stress factor was Niall's fans. I didn't know if I should tell them... Or when to tell them. This hole ordeal would make everything just so much harder but I didn't want to leave Niall. Especially now when I need him at its most.