Today I trained with Arsen and it was long without any breaks and the guards were brutal hitting us if we did something wrong. I make my way down the wing where all us children of magic have rooms. I almost enter Astrid's room but I remember that tonight is the night we agreed to actually sleep apart. No more being cowards and being scared--but I am scared.
I enter my chambers that is decorated all in the king's color blue and I put on my pajamas and crawl into the full sized bed hiking the covers over me. I try to sleep but all I can hear is the rain and the wind hit the window glass and it rattles. The room is so dark except for the dim moonlight shining through the double window. I am scared and I don't want to be alone right now. I start to cry as I clap my hands together and start to pray.
"Please, I don't want to be alone. I am begging you Gods, don't let me be alone." I sob aloud.
Thunder strikes loudly and lightning fills the room, panic and terror flashes throughout me. Seconds later my chambers door is being opened and Astrid is standing there looking just as pale as I probably do. I open up the covers and urge for Astrid to join me and she does. I wrap my arms around her body and hold her close to me.
The storm rages on and with every rumble Astrid and I hold each other a little tighter. I look into her hazel eyes and she looks into mine. "Don't leave." I say to her.
"Not ever." She holds out her pinky and I wrap mine around hers.
I wake up in the middle of the night to the memory, nearly seven years old and that lonely feeling was always there until Astrid was by my side. Astrid, my dearest friend, my first love, she is my best friend, my sister and I will forever be grateful for her.
I head next door to the nursery to tend to the babies. Riesner is sound asleep in his crib, but Hollis is awake and looking up at his mobile. I pick him up and kiss him. "Hi Hollis." I coo and rub my nose on his soft cheek. Gods he's growing so fast it's making me sad. Just being with him makes life seem so bittersweet, I love him more than anything--along with Ries and Raidyn. I never thought I would have this type of happiness in my entire existence. I sit down with him and rock him until we are both asleep.
Alanna startles me by shaking me awake. She takes Hollis and I stand up to yawn and stretch. I walk to my chambers to get dressed for the day and Raidyn is already up.
"I was in the nursery, I couldn't sleep last night." I admit to him as I walk toward my wardrobe. I look at him warily and I know he's going to say something because today--unfortunately, is my birthday. Twenty-two years old.
"Anything I can do for you, my queen?" Raidyn asks.
"No." I shake my head. "Nothing at all." I say in hopes of him not making a big deal over this day. "I'm just going to get dressed and play with my babies." I give him a small smile.
"Ah, great idea. I'll join you!" He claps his hands together and heads towards his own wardrobe.
I grin and put on one of my favorite dresses, just because I hate my birthday doesn't mean I can't look my best. I fix my hair in a braided fashion and place my crown atop my head. I wait for Raidyn to finish putting his hair in a bun as we walk next door to the nursery excuses Alanna and Rosie. I grab an awake Ries and put him on the floor, he has been standing on his own so I'm just helping him in trying to get him to take his first steps. He's more talkative lately too and I know that's trouble--he even started to say "Ma-ma." Hollis is a relatively quiet baby compared to Ries, he is full of energy but he always seems content when he is being held.
"Look at you big boy." I say as I hold Ries's hands and he stands stomping his feet and laughing. I let go slightly and he falls on his butt--but doesn't cry. I watch him struggle to get up again, it's trial and error as he continue to falls down.
