Station 11

vingt-neuf.

[Disclaimer: If you are still sensitive about the things that happened with Jonghyun, don't read this chapter yet. I wanted to upload this chapter at the exact day but after I heard the news I decided not to, because it would be disrespectful and I was also under shock. So I waited and even thought about not uploading it at all. But this chapter is important for the next chapters of the story so I had to keep it. Thanks for taking your time to read the disclaimer]
.

It was still a secret between Mingyu and me. It was hard to keep it. I sometimes just wanted to scream into people's faces about how I felt about gaining this much weight.

But Mingyu told me that Wonwoo and Junhui had a fight and that Wonwoo stopped talking to anyone. Even Mingyu or his therapist couldn't a get a single word out of him. Not even his mom who started to call him everyday.

So I was more surprised, when Mingyu met me in the hallway to talk with me about Wonwoo.

"Wonwoo said something to me", he said.

"Really? What did he say?"

"He wants to talk to you. In our room", was his only answer.

I was confused, but still went to their room. Mingyu left and said that Wonwoo wanted to be alone with me. I knew what was going to happen. He was going to tell me. And I was so scared.

I opened the door and stepped in. The room was dark and the air around me was suddenly very warm. The curtains were closed and Wonwoo was sitting at the edge of his bed. I could only see him from his back. From the weak lighting coming from the hallway, I could see him shivering and his breath was fast, since his back was moving up and down quickly.

"Close the door", he said.

I did so.

"Can I switch on the-", I wanted to talk, but he interrupted me.

"No"

"Is everything okay?", I was scared in this darkness, but I couldn't move.

"Guess what I just did", he said and a chuckle came out of his mouth.

"What?", I was so confused.

"You heard me. Just guess what I did", he repeated himself.

"Wonwoo, I don't know what you are talking about. I am scared" I told him.

"Fine, I'll tell you. I took a shit ton of pills. Sleeping pills. I think it was one entire package. I might finally die", he said in a calm voice.

I couldn't take it no longer and switched on the lights.

Wonwoo turned around, so that I could see him. His lips were dry and his forehead was sweating. His bangs were also soaked in sweat. His eyes were blinking a lot. His nails were bloody. He probably was chewing them, while being nervous.

"Wonwoo, I am going to call a nurse", I said and went to the door.

"If you stay, I'll tell you everything", he stopped me with these words.

I was stuck. My head was messed up. He got me. With this one sentence.

"No, I-"

"Stay", he again repeated. And I did so. I hated myself for listening to him.

"Junhui bullied me. No, he destroyed my life. He destroyed everything", he said and tears came out of his eyes.

"That's it?", I asked him, making it sound more mean than I wanted to.

"Minghao! He beat me up nearly every day for a year. He called me terrible names. He even knew everything about my private life and destroyed my previous relationships. He made me feel terrible and embarrassed all the time. He burned my essays and even my jacket that I got as a gift. He took my food at lunchtime and poured it over my head. He stalked me after school. He did steal my clothes. He made our parents become friends, so that he could see me more often and to do even worse things. He knew that I couldn't swim and pushed me into a deep lake. I could've drowned if Mingyu didn't save me. He laughed, he only laughed after I showed him my bleeding wrists and that he was the reason for this. I thought I could escape him, after coming here, but no. I have to see this face every fucking day. He is happy. He dances, he is in love, he is laughing a lot. In front of me. He doesn't even feel sorry. He doesn't even care, about what he has done to me", Wonwoo was crying under his words.

"Wonwoo-"

"I could've attended college right now. I am almost twenty, but don't even have a high school graduatuion. I know his life was terrible, too. But why did he do this to me? This wasn't bullying. He wanted to see, if a single person could break another person this much. He doesn't deserve you. He doesn't deserve anything. He doesn't even deserve to die. If I die right now, I want him to feel guilty for the rest of his life. For killing me"

I was angry, no. This was more than
that. I was disgusted and hate was coming up. I was so much under shock. Junhui was a monster. He was a terrible monster.

I came back to my senses, when Wonwoo passed out. He fell from his bed onto the floor. His head crashed onto the edge of the bed that was made out of wood.

I totally forgot the pills after this story. I ran out of the room into Dr. Nam's office. Junhui was sitting there.

"What happened?", Dr.Nam could feel my tension.

"Wonwoo passed out. He took an entire package of sleeping pills. He is in his room", and after these words, Dr. Nam ran out of the room without saying anything.

I stayed were I was to calm down. Junhui was staring at me.

"Why did he do it?", he asked me.

"Are you kidding me? Are you actually kidding me?", my voice was loud and changed Junhui's expression. He was scared. It was my first time seeing him being scared.

"I hate you, Junhui. I hate you so much", I screamed and run towards him.

I pulled him out of his chair and pushed him onto the floor. I just started to punch him. His face and chest and stomach. I just tried to hurt him. I wanted to hurt him. And he didn't react. He just lied there. He knew that he deserved it.

His lip started to bleed. He couldn't open his right eye anymore. But he didn't let a single sound out of him. I totally lost my control, stood up and kicked him, while screaming the most mean words into his face. But I couldn't find any words to describe his actions.

Finally nurses showed up to stop me and two men carried Junhui away. I was staring at his bleeding face and he was staring at my furious expression. Tears appeared in Junhui's eyes.

"I'm so sorry", he whispered, before he left with the help of the men.

His words stayed in my head.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST THIS YEAR. HOPE THAT MANY OF YOUR RESOLUTIONS COME TRUE!