Boom, Clap

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Sleep was inevitable that night. I tossed and turned, cried, hurt, and hated him. But at the same time I wanted to feel his arm's around me assuring me I was his one and only and this would all workout.

The next morning I looked like death warmed over, even after my bath and make-up. There was no hiding my bloodshot, puffy eye's, no hiding my red nose and no hiding the sadness etched into my face.

Once at work I was asked by several coworkers if I felt well. I'd offer up a weak smile and assure them it was just allergies from my parent's new pet cat. In reality I was dying inside and coffee was my best friend. By the time lunch came by I was drowning in my own misery. I'd yet to turn my phone on but apart of me wanted to call him. To ask him why? To know how he could do me this way? He probably didn't even care. He's probably off right now with his bimbo while I'm suffering and picking up the pieces.

I decided a walk on my lunch hour would do me good. Fresh air and sunshine fixes everything right? Wrong, so wrong. It only made me more miserable as I watched happy couple's pass me by smiling and so in love. I ducked into a small deli just to hide away. Not wanting the world to see me I chose a back table to wallor in my sorrow. I ordered a water and chicken salad sandwich on wheat but mostly just picked at it. As I was about to rise and discard my trash I heard a male's voice. "Jacey is that you?"

Looking over I saw Mathew, a boy I had went to high school with and had bumped into a few time's since my return. I inwardly groaned as he sat down across from me. Not because I disliked him, i just wasn't up for company. "You look sick? Are you okay?"

Jesus, I wish people would quit asking me that. It's just a polite way to say you look like shit. Giving a fake smile I  have him the same sorry excuse I'd been giving everyone. "Just allergies. My parent's got a cat and well..."

I just left him to feel in the rest. "Oh, I see. You know you can get meds for that?"

Jesus shut up I wanted to scream but I knew he was only trying to help. "Yes, I know" I said politely then stood.

"Sorry, i must get back to work. It was good seeing you though". I said gathering my thing's.

No sooner that I got a few feet down the sidewalk and i felt a few drops of rain. Just great I thought. My next step was interrupted by a honking horn. Looking over I saw Matthew. "Let me give you a lift Jacey"?

Looking at the black sky that was threatening a pour down I hopped into his car and told him where to take me. As we neared my work place he asked again. "You sure your okay? I'm a good listener".

I don't know if it was the rain, my tender emotions or the fact everyone kept asking me that but I broke. I buried my face into my hands and wept. "I caught my boyfriend cheating and broke thing's off last night".

"I'm so sorry JJ. I didn't realize you saw anyone. I've never seen you with anyone?" Matthew said trying to comfort me.

"He lives in Italy. I met him over the summer". I offered up.

"Oh, I see. A long distance relationship. They almost never work. Sorry. Maybe I could take you out later just to cheer you up?" Matthew asked.

"Thanks any way Matthew, but I'm not in mood to be cheered up. Besides I wouldn't make the best company right now". I stated not really wanting to go anywhere with him. At least I had a good excuse. Not that Matthew wasn't nice or good looking, but my heart was elsewhere.  He wheeled into my job and got out to walk me to the door. As soon as we turned the corner I saw him. He was standing there and as his eye's met mine they turned cold and callous. I knew what this must look like to him. I was getting out of a car with another man who had his hand placed on the small of my back leading me along. Then it struck me, I shouldn't care what it looked like. We wasn't together anymore and he had been two timing me. There was also a part of me that wanted to rush to him and throw myself in his arm's but that quickly changed as this vile look twisted his gorgeous features into something of a killer's empty face. Looking from me to Matthew he started striding toward us. "Matthew you should go now. Hurry". I rushed out in a panic.

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