At A Loss

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My heart was thudding against my ribcage as Staveno carried me down the steep hill. Nothing but ocean was at the bottom of this cliff and I feared I was seeing the last of my day's. "Please Staveno". I sobbed but got nothing in return.

He kept walking downward until the ocean was just feet from us. As my head bounced against his back I wrapped my arm's around him tightly and fisted his shirt. If his plan was to toss me into the rough water's he'd need to pry me off him. Just as we came a few steps away from the water, he took a sharp turn that went beside the water's edge. I could determine that we was now on a narrow path that went down even deeper. "Staveno". I whimpered but still no reply.

I started wiggling around again trying to work free but he tightened his grip. Then I spotted a cave up ahead and new panic set in. "Stop Staveno. What are you going to do to me?"

Without a word, he stepped into the cave and sat my feet on the ground. However he didn't release his grip on me. Had I not been so scared I would have enjoyed the beauty of the cave. Turquoise water sat calmly in the bottom and caused a shimmering effect on the cave wall's. A small opening graced the roof allowing a beam of sunlight to shine through. If I wasn't so scared at the moment I could enjoy the beauty more. At least if I was about to die, I'd go in a pretty place.

Staveno removed his sweatshirt and placed it on the ground and indicating for me to sit. Once I did, he joined me. We sat in silence and I didn't know what to expect from him next. Suddenly he spoke softly. "I use to come here as a boy. Sometimes with friend's sometimes alone. When my mind was muddled this place always helped clear my head".

I didn't know what to say so I just sat there but what happened next took me by surprise. Staveno burried his face into his hands and started to sob. A part of me wanted to go to him while the other refused. I'd never seen him this way, so vulnerable and openly showing these emotions. Eventually he calmed down and looked up at me with tears clinging to his thick lashes and my heart started to hurt. In a raspy, emotional filled voice he spoke. "I'm so sorry love. I know that's not enough and I don't blame you. I should've listened to you, took your feelings into consideration."

I continued to sit quietly as he stood up. Walking to the cave wall, he faced it and placed his forearm against the rock leaning his head against his arm. He spoke through a sob. "This hurts so fucking bad Jacey. I've never felt pain like this. I can't fucking eat, sleep or think. I can't function without you. I just want you, that's all. Then I think Izzy's sweet little face and I know I failed her too. I couldn't love her mother properly. Please love, make this hurt go away".

Finally I spoke in a soft tone. "I need time Staveno. I need to think. I'm not saying that we are done, I just need space".

Staveno slowly nodded his head. "I understand. It's my fault. I'll give you the time you need". He said horsely, on the verge of crying again.

Reaching into his pocket and handed me a shiny box. "I picked these up on my way to see you at work. It's not much, you deserve much more".

I opened the box and gasped. Sitting on a velvet pad rested a pair of huge diamond earrings. "Their stunning Staveno".

"No, they won't be stunning until you wear them. Your beauty will only enhance them".

After a few minutes we left and I allowed him to carry me back up the steep hill. Once in the car he said. "Don't fret over what happened today. I'll make sure your name or magazine  won't be mixed up in this".

I nodded and told him to take me home. I didn't feel up to working after all of this. Once home, I fetched Izzy from the nanny and went to the guest house. That night, once Izzy was down I took a long soak wearing only my earrings. Afterwards I crawled into bed and was just about to switch my lamp off when my phone buzzed with a text from Staveno.

So there's this girl I had the pleasure of meeting several year's ago. We met quite by accident at my club after she had snuck in. Something about her intrigued me and her beauty stopped all logic. Technically we hadn't actually met yet but we did share some rather humorous texts. Finally the time came where we actually did meet and her angel voice captured me. I wanted her more than life itself, I wanted her so much that I even hung out with her annoying friend's hearing all the lame girl talk. Year's passed and thing's happened but I never stopped thinking of her, loving her. By a miracle we meet up again and I get her back. She gives me the gift of my beautiful daughter and I lose her again. The pain is more than unbearable and I can't even breathe. Her scent envelopes my room, I think I hear her laughter, feel her arm's around me and it's driving me to the point of insanity. I love you so much Jacey"

Open.

Biting back my tears I phoned the nanny and had her come over to stay with Izzy. Once she was here, I raced to the main house. I opened his bedroom door and found him sitting on the bed holding my pillow to him. When he saw me he stood up and fell to his knees. Clasping his hands together he started to beg me. Not able to hold back any longer I flung myself into his arm's. Staveno wrapped me up so tightly it nearly crushed my ribs. Instantly our lips found each other and this kiss was like none other.

Eventually he carried me to the bed where the kiss continued as we stripped each other from our clothes. Staveno trailed his mouth along my belly until he reached the apex between my legs. "I've missed your taste so bad love". He said in a raspy voice.

After a long time he moved his body up the length of mine and slid into me releasing a low growl. His hands gripped each side of my face and he leaned his forehead against mine as his hips rotated ever so slowly. With each thrust he released a "ummmm". Followed by sweet word's.

"Ummm... your pussy feels so good to me love".

I wrapped my legs and arm's around him as his eye's bore into mine.

"Ummmm... I love you so much my baby".

His lips pecked my nose than each cheek. "Ummmm... I want to spend the rest of my life with you".

I saw his eye's fill up with emotion. "Never will anything like this happen again love".

He placed a gentle kiss to my lips. "Ummm... thank you for letting me have you".

My body started to rock with another orgasm and as I cried out Staveno told me how beautiful I looked at that very moment.

We laid awake all night talking about how to fix our problems over wine and multiple snack food's. At sunrise we sat outside in each other's arm's with only a blanket wrapped around us.

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