Suffer. (Chris Brown Love Story) (PAUSED)

18.

<< For the last chapter the person in the multimedia was Zuri

Ranae

My soul was empty. I didn't know how to feel or what to feel. The only man who was there for me in my life and was only the father figure I really had was Calvin Beniz. And now he's dead and I don't know what to do. It's all my fault I should've answered my phone when he called. He could've still been alive right now if it wasn't too late but it was and its all on me.

I was at the hospital with my mom who was filling out some paper work and Zuri. Turns out my dad died of a heart attack.She was so devastated I felt so bad for her. As bad as I wanted to cry in front of her I couldn't, he told me to be strong for her and that's what I was gonna do.

Natalie, who was my mom sister, was catching a flight today from Texas to stick around for a little until things simmer down.

We walked out the hospital with our shades on but was greeted by hella paparazzi asking us hella questions but we ignored them and proceeded to our truck which our driver drove us in today.

When we went home, my mom went straight up to her room and I followed her.

"I be right back" I told Zuri.

I went upstairs and saw her sitting on the bed for a second and then I heard snuffles.

"Mom" I sat next to her.

"It hurts so hard Ranae"

"I understand"

I hugged her tight and she laid her head on my shoulder finally letting all the tears out.

"Why would they take my husband from me? The love of my life, my bestfriend"

"I'm so sorry mom"

I just let her get all her tears out. After she started to calm down she lifted her head and wiped her eyes.

"Mom I'm so sorry this happened.."

"Why are you apologizing its not your fault"

"It is and-"

"No the hell its not this was because of his health and the disease he had for a very long time"

"I know but I didn't answer the phone when he called" I started to break down in tears.

"I should've answered" I did the ugly cry, noise and everything. She grabbed me tight and rubbed my back.

"No baby don't say that, don't put this on you this is not your fault at all! Now stop crying like this, your father wouldn't wanna see you like this. Be strong baby don't make me cry again because seeing you cry like this makes my heart break even more and I never saw you cry"

She was right I had to stay strong but it was just too hard.

My phone vibrated in my phone causing me to quickly get it. I was surprised, it was a text from Chris.

Chris: Come over? I'll explain everything..

I stared at the text and then put my phone back in my pocket.

"Honey you don't have to stay, if you got stuff to do then go ahead"

"I don't wanna leave you"

She gave me this look.

"I'm ok for now plus my sister coming later so I'm not gon be alone for long"

"You sure?"

"Yes"

I gave her a long and tight hug then stood up. I looked at her one last time and walked out the door. I guess I'll see what's up with Chris. I need to talk to him anyway.
-
I knocked on his door and waited until he opened it. As I was doing this Zuri was out in the car. It seems as if she was in a rush to get home but I told her it wouldn't take that long. I heard him unlocking the locks and open the door. He moved to the side to let me in. I pushed up my sunglasses and entered his house. He closed the door and we walked to his living room to sit down.