Expressing Thoughts-J.D

-58-

"Hey babe" Jenna greeted me as we arrived in at their house in Ohio. I hugged her so tightly, I never wanted to let go. I started to cry as soon as she squeezed me but I had to stop quickly so Josh wouldn't see.

"I'll take our bags up to the room" Josh said nicely, he kissed my head as he walked past. Jenna wiped away the tears i had on my eyes and smiled kindly at me.

"Come on, let's get you a mamosa" she grinned, I laughed slightly and followed her into her kitchen. She poured me a drink and handed it to me then poured her self one.

"How's Ollie?" I asked, trying to avoid the elephant in the room.

"He's good, sleeping well for now. Having some bonding time with our husbands I expect." She giggled as we clinked our drinks.

"That's good" I sipped my drink.

"We should go out tonight, to celebrate. I can get my sister or Tyler's parents to look after Ollie" she suggested, I nodded.

"Yeah, that would be fun" I agreed.

Josh and Tyler came from downstairs holding Ollie. It stung a little bit but I knew I shouldn't be bitter. I put on a huge smile as Josh held Ollie in his arm.

"Hey there Ollie" I squealed, I ran up to Josh and watched as he grinned.

"We're gonna go over to Kristin's, show off Ollie" Jenna laughed, "and ask her to babysit" she added, Josh's head snapped up.

"Why where are you going?" He seemed concerned for his godchild. I made funny faces at Ollie while Josh held him, eventually I couldn't resist and took him off Josh.

"I thought we could go out and celebrate Sage's new job" she relayed the conversation. Tyler kissed his wife and grabbed a drink from the fridge.

"That sounds like a great idea, right Josh?" Tyler agreed. I looked up from the baby to watch Josh's reaction. He was staring at me as if he didn't know what to say.

"I mean, yeah. I would love that" he said it right at me, I gave him a small smile to try and convince him that I actually did want to go. I heard a click and we both snapped our heads to Tyler who had just taken a photo of us.

"You can tell you love each other" he said to his phone as he looked at the photo. Jenna was just grinning at us both so I put on my best smile.

"That we do" I said and kissed Josh on the lips. He looked like a smug little boy when I pulled away.

"Okay, I'll go and get Ollie dressed so we can go" Jenna took the baby off me but not before I gave him a big kiss. Tyler went with her, leaving Josh and I in the kitchen.

I wrapped my arms around Josh which I didn't think he expected. He accepted my gesture and gave me a cheeky smirk. He moved his hands to my cheeks and grinned.

"You're so beautiful" he swooned. I closed my eyes and smiled.

"Shut up" I giggled, he giggled back and suddenly my Josh was back. He didn't look at me as if I were broken anymore.

"Where are we sleeping?" I asked, he raised his eyebrows which made me giggle.

"Upstairs in their guest bedroom. Is that okay?" He smiled his gorgeous smile and it made me go all funny inside.

"Perfect, let's go." I ran a hand through his hair and kissed him hard, he gripped my back and pulled me closer. I giggled into the kiss and squeezed his arm so he moved away.

We met Tyler and Jenna in the hall, they had their baby bags ready which made them ook like a proper family. They were a cute family.

When we arrived at Kristin's, I didn't realise that Jenna's sister had four children. There was a lot of noise when we walked in, it was quite overwhelming. Josh stayed close to me the whole time, I had only met Jenna's sister a few times but Josh had known her for quite a while so he was way more aquainted with all her children than i was.

"Josh!" A small little girl ran up to Josh and hugged him.

"Mercy!" He cried, he picked her up but i couldn't help but grin. She started touching Josh's hair and then she saw me.

"Hey Mercy, I don't suppose you remember me" The last time I saw her she was quite small and all she did was play and then sleep. She was cute though, she would break hearts. She broke out into the most gorgeous giggle.

"Silly Sage" My heart broke at her words, its always nice to be remembered. I started to breath heavily so I looked around to change the subject.

"Do you both want a drink? I'm gonna get a drink" I said, Josh smiled as Mercy played with his hair some more.

"I'll have water, what about you miss mercy" he babied his voice, she shook her head so he just looked at me with a goofy grin.

"Okay" I smiled, I kissed Mercy's head and then walked towards the kitchen area. I looked into the living room to see Tyler showing Ollie off to Kristin's husband and kids but then found Jenna and Kristin in the kitchen together.

"Hey, you want wine or something?" Kristin offered, I gave her a hug and shook my head.

"Is it okay if I just grab a water for Josh?" I asked, she nodded kindly. It was nice to be around someone who didn't know what had happened. I grabbed a glass and filled it up with water, I walked back into the living room where Josh had moved himself and gave it to him.

"Thanks babe" He grinned up at me from the floor. Now he had Mercy and Zion sat with him on the floor. "Do you want to join?" he grinned up at me. The girls stared up at me too, awaiting my response.

"That's okay, I'm gonna talk in the kitchen with Jen and Kristin" i declined. He puckered his lips so i leant down and kissed him, receiving an array of 'ew's from the girls.

"You kissed her" Mercy squealed, I laughed while Josh scrunched up his nose and nodded.

"I do it a lot actually" he whispered then smiled up at me. I kissed his fluffy hair and then made my way back to the kitchen.

"So, Sage what is this new job Jenna has been telling me about?" I sat on one of her swivel chairs and gave her my best smile. They poured me a glass of wine even though I didn't want one.

"Well, I've been a makeup artist for about 10 years now and it's great and all but I want to go further. So I had an interview with the brand 'benefit' and they want to make my ideas for a makeup line a reality" I explained, they both looked at each other and seemed impressed.

"Wow, cheers to that" Kristin raised her glass and we all clinked it with ours.

"That's so exciting, you're going to be the next Jaclyn Hill!" Jenna giggled, I gasped.

"I don't think I could ever be as good at the lord saviour Jaclyn Hill." I did one of those father, son, Holy Spirit thing with my hands and we all laughed.

"Mommy, I want a drink" Mercy came in. Kristin picked her up and sat her on the counter so she could get her a drink. Mercy crawled along the counter top towards me and came up real close to my face. I closed the gap between up and snoop booped her nose.

"I like Joshie " she whispered in my ear, I grinned at her and she grinned back.

"Me too" I whispered, I shifted my eyes to Jenna who was smiling at me. For once, it didn't hurt to see or talk to a child and that was progress.