If You Only Knew... [completed]

Four

 Hey,

 Today again I got my hopes up when I shouldn't and of course it was linked to you.

 Today,just before I live, you grabbed my arm and turned me to face you, I stumbled and I hit my head against your chest. 

 It was the first time we were that close, I felt myself blushing so I turned my head not to face you so you couldn't see me with a face as red as a tomato but I couldn't help having a little smile, i was so happy, I was yelling in my head :"yaaaaaaaaaay".

 You grabbed my chin with your free hand and made me face you. I didn't dare look at you but I could feel that your gaze was on me, I couldn't stop blushing, it was embarassing!

 Then, you moved your hand from my chin to my check, that's when I dared look a you, you had a smirk that made me melt, I couldn't stop fixing you. And suddenly, you let go of me and stepped back a little and you wishpered: " she was right...pff".

 I didn't know who she was and what you were talking about, I was about to ask you when you asked me first to prepare myself for dinner tonight, you said that you'll pick me up.

 I was surprised that you knew where I live and also that you asked me for a dinner. That's when I started getting my hopes up.

  I remembered Nicole so I asked you why you would take me for a dinner? There were sparkles in my eyes caused by all the hope I had that something begun between us but you broke all those hopes: " Don't start imaging things, it's a business dinner and I wanted to ask Nicole to come but something came up so she couldn't, besides I think that you master the subject well, at least you're way better than the other employees".

  That's what you told me, you broke me again. I think I'm getting used to it, but still the pain I feel doesn't change, I hoped that with time, at least, it'll decrease but it doesn't.

 Even the fact that you think that I am the best employee doesn't diminishe the pain I feel, you said what you said haughtily with a smirk and your head raised up, it was the same way your girl talked to me, maybe that's one of the reasons that made you meant to be.

 I want to hate you , I want it so damn bad, I'm sick and tired of wetting my pages by the tears I cry for you and because of you. You're making me feel so bad, feel like I'm nothing, but that's what I am, I'm nothing without you..