[ i wrote this when i am younger, so yes - i do agree this one is very confusing! i havent edited the chapters sooooo read with this caution in your mind !]
" if he is that arrogant, how come i can easily meet his smile? "
1 of universe to realize...
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“ you look different. your vibes your action and your eyes even shining differently. but still you have that. the warmth that lingers always around you. ”
ma jihae
to be honest, i am always wondering about this particular one person in my class. he always come early even before everyone else. he come exactly at seven a.m and exit the school at three. he rarely miss school and he wrote using his left hand.
he always had this warm smile as if it was drew onto his face and the warmth that he gave always had me feel good even we never talked before. thats on my first year of highschool.
the next year however, i recognized some change to him. he started to distant himself from our classmate and he wear black atleast once a week. whenever he wore black, his eyes look deeper than before but he still spoke softly whenever the teacher ask him the question in class.
maybe after few months, he change a little bit more, after the whole gossip about him at school. he didnt greet everybody anymore , he started to drink banana milk more and when it is wednesday, he most likely didnt talk at all.
then, that one particular day we talked , i didnt think it was particularly special. he simply just helping me organizing our class assignment paper that scattered to the floor due to the wind. he didnt utter words but he gave me the smile that i always saw before. thats it.
but maybe.. it is different.
that day, we supposed to submit our assignment to the teacher and since i am the last one to pass out my paper, i volunteered to send it to the teachers room.
and that day, is wednesday.
———🌸
tuesday , july 17
that was glimpse that i saw from the book where mrs pyo always write something. maybe discipline things or maybe just some things of her blind date.
on mrs pyo hand is seungmin phone, where he claimed to have the video from cctv that actually told the real story about my fight with the other girls. i simply didnt understand what he trying to fight , it is my fault that i even touch her , and at one point i cursed.
but mrs pyo is so immersed toward the video and somehow she look too convinced.
i didnt remember her having good relationship with felix gang, so seungmin doesnt have the advantage in this case. the video kept playing until the one point i get weirded out. i stared at the same screen that mrs pyo stare but it feel different.
as if what im going through is just my imagination . i didnt spurt any curse and the whole situation of this make me look like i am not guilty at all. when the video ended, i ended up questioning myself.
do i even there, or whatever is happening .. i dont particularly understand.
“ ma jihae. you are done here. i'm taking kim seungmin video as evidence that you are not guilty, and you may go now. you shouldn't be too nice toward people , jihae. stood for yourself too. ” mrs pyo patting my shoulder softly as she spoke that. i feel her sincerity but somehow.. it didnt feel right.
“ and for you kim seungmin, thankyou for coming here today. you save jihae today. "
and mrs pyo left us. both of us on this silent room, together. the awkward silence started, but it felt uncomfortable. i always had this silence when i am with hyunjin but why did it felt different today?
is it seungmin, or is it me?
" im going first then. " he suddenly stood, creasing the hem of his shirt that hidden behind his black sweater.
its been a long time, but he wore it now. the last time he wore the sweater was maybe when i first saw him with felix and the others. and that way too long for me to remember.
" wait, seungmin. " i paused between my word, letting him to give me full of his attention. he didnt even turn back from his step at the door, but he did stopped. "what is happening? do felix asked for your help?"
silence greeted us once again. he didnt answered, yet he didnt walked away. he look so different from seungmin that i befriended days before , yet his feel..
" its even. i save you and you save me. thats why i am here. " thats all he said before he walked away.
staring at the wall, i feel so confused and flustered. its not even that big, and i knew what going to happen even if mrs pyo knew the truth. but what seungmin does, completely made it complicated.
appreciated but it left me wondering why. and his word didnt made up so much sense either.
oh wait.
i was late for the next class. thats why seungmin is going first earlier. why didnt he tell me!? checking up the phone for my schedule next, i stormed up .
ma jihae, class 3-2 wednesday 10:45 am // english class / block b english room
hi ho im back? mery christmas everyone, and this is my kind of little present to everyone that still interested in this complicated story :)
