like him ; sk hwang hyunjin

39

  

   hyunjin didnt took that long to run off from his family car toward the kim family house. 

    he desperately prayed that seungmin is going to be fine eventhough he knew how his condition can be severe at time. that one time he kinda off himself was when he found him jumping from his window at the second floor.

     whatever it is,  he wasnt ready to see seungmin in other condition other than fine. 

    he ran toward the main door toward the direction that he doesnt feel awkward to go.  this family house was almost like his playground,  he also thought that half of his life are growing here,  with him.

    he stopped when he saw the current condition. dr han knocked at the door while saying something he couldnt processed and both of his parent hugging among themselves with mrs kim tried not to cry again.

    however, once she saw him she burst into tears and asked him for help tremendously, and maybe at that time, hyunjin felt how tense the situation are.

      "hyunjin,  please help to talk to my son, i dont know what happening but dr han said he was at a very good condition at their last meeting..— i didnt know why he was acting like this. " his mother cried as she kept hugging him.  hyunjin was speechless,  he wasnt ready for this.

     at least for seungmin,  he doesnt ready for him.

     after mrs kim finally let him go,  he walked slowly toward dr han, wanting to know how this happened.  or at least his bestfriend condition.

     " he didnt talked at all at school right? " she questioned.  and then it hit him.  seungmin behavior change,  that he was very occupied himself to detect that.  he felt dissapointed with himself to no detect that.

     hwang hyunjin,  you dont deserve seungmin.  really,  after all things he done for you.

     dr han gave him personal space with seungmin as the adult went down,  even getting opposition from seungmin mom.

    eventually,  there only hyunjin left,  standing before seungmin room door.

     he knocked once.
     twice.
     no answer,  and he didnt feel any need to knock again. 

     "hey seungmin? its hyunjin. " he said as he positioned himself to sit infront of the door. the floor felt cold but this situation is somehow colder,  and he could feel some long distance between him and his best friend,  behind the door.

     not any sound come from kim seungmin,  but he didnt panicked over that.  in fact, he would worry if he answered.  the silent seungmin mean he is already in a calm state, and he become someone he is again.

     "i am a bad bestfriend right?  i dont even catch up of something different with you lately. like i am at the past year. i am very occupied. things getting hard this day.. " he said,  pondering upon words he should tell next. 

     " i guess i cant change the fact that i am no good to everyone,  and that maybe finally apply to you too. i am very sorry. " one tear dropped to his cheek,  feeling the regret of his feeling. maybe he should give up on everything, maybe toward the girl too—

     the door finally opened revealing the puppy looking boy in a mess hair but a very concerned face. " you arent wrong in this hyunjin.  i should be able to takecare of myself well,  and "
he paused before squating facing the latter, giving him a reassuring smile.

    " you are more stronger than you think.  so am i. "

—💗

mdd ; major depressive disorder

— also known simply as depression, is a mental disorder characterized by at least two weeks of low mood that is present across most situations. It is often accompanied by low self-esteem, loss of interest in normally enjoyable activities, low energy, and pain without a clear cause.

     and so hyunjin noticed.

      after finally called ambulance, police and seungmin parents , he still shocked to see how different seungmin react after he cried talking to him about how there is a monster in him.

    so fast, he couldnt even blink.

    a week after that he received a call from mrs kim telling him that seungmin finally want to be diagnosed,  but he didnt really let his mum to tell anybody,  including him. even dr han couldnt tell jisung about him,  she took oath of that.

    but he told him afterall.  no secret condition still apply between them,  he said.

   but the second year of highschool for kim seungmin is pretty severe.  he took it all hardly and had pretty much lot time alone to reset himself back.

    and maybe seungmin doesnt want him know that one thing,  that he really wanted to keep from hyunjin. 

    that he wasnt supposed to be the only child in kim family.

     that took hyunjin to a surprise . he had been friend with him since they both seven,  how could he didnt know that?

     seungmin also didnt know. 
     up until he was 14, he doesnt even remembered that he originally has a brother and a sister,  a pair of twin.

      but then he lose them, because of that one arson happened,  and his parents choose to save him, not really a choice they can make but saving him was the easiest,  and the rest is history.

     and thats how his heart break so much. so much that he felt he could die.

     — 💗

   
this took me a long time.  its hard to wrote this.  to everyone that read this, i hope you guys will be happy today, tommorow and forever!!