The One I Want

Tolerated

Jimin

My hands are trembling as I dial the number I'd rather erase from my memory altogether. Unfortunately I know that despite my hatred—Jin is right. As my baby's father, Namjoon has rights. As an alpha it doesn't matter how those rights came to be.
My heart stutters as he picks up. "Jimin?"
My lips part but nothing comes out. Instead I suck in a deep breath, feeling on the verge of a panic attack. "Namjoon."
He sighs. "I know I'm the last person in the world you want to talk to right now but do you think you could hear me out? Please?"
I clench my jaw. "Do you really think you deserve that? After everything you and...and Taehyung did to me? You made your own brother sleep with me just to force me into this..."
"I know. I know what I did and I regret it. I was desperate. It doesn't make it an excuse for my behavior but..." He groans. "I guess I took direction from Jungkook. It backfired. Maybe I wanted us to end up like him and his mate—"
I laugh. "Are you fucking with me right now?! Jungkook is nowhere near as bad as you! At least he's redeemable! You and Tae can kiss my ass!"
I'm panting with rage, wanting to see him just so I can punch him in the face. God, I loathe him and his stupid beautiful omega brother.
"Can we make a deal? A contract of sorts? I want to be in my child's life, Jimin. Hate me all you want but you can't take that from me. I'm willing to work with you to show my good faith. I really want to show you I can change. I won't hurt you." He offers.
I hesitate, rolling my eyes. "Think I'm going to fall for that? You and Tae are both manipulative assholes."
He sighs. "Just come talk to me, yeah? How about at that little cafe I know you like. In public so you don't have to be afraid. You can come and go as you want. I just want to talk and try to work this out."
I narrow my eyes. "You won't try to take me again? How can I even trust you? You have a track record, you know."
"You can bring Jin or Jungkook with you. I'm not telling you what to do—I'm simply asking for us to communicate about our child."
I curse internally, hating everyone at this moment. Including myself. "Fine. I'll meet you but one wrong look and I'm out. Don't touch me, either." I demand.
"I won't."
With great reluctance, I plan a time and feel dread as I hang up and walk back into the kitchen to see Jin and Hoseok eating and laughing. They both stop when they see me.
I force a tiny unconvincing smile. "I'm going out. I'll be back in a bit."
Jin frowns, eyeing me in that stupid knowledgeable way all grown ups looks at kids who are about to do something obviously stupid. Shit, maybe this is a sign—
"Okay. Hurry back, though."
Or maybe not. I blink. "Okay."

      I catch a cab downtown to my favorite fancy cafe—the one I always made Namjoon stop at after our lavish shopping sprees. God, I was so naively selfish and materialistic.
If I'd had any real sense about me I wouldn't be in this stupid predicament. Walking in, I see him right away and hate how good he looks. I maybe never really paid much attention to the alpha other than his wallet—being hung up on his brother and all—but I won't deny he's far from ugly.
Smoothing down my newly acquired white silk shirt compliment of Hoseok, I take a seat across from him. Scowling at the table, I see my favorite cake and coffee sitting before me already ordered. Why the hell does he know me so well?
He watches me observe everything in silence, smiling a little. Ugh. It feels condescending at best. I hate his smug handsome face.
I force myself to ignore the cake despite the baby protesting loudly. "So what is this deal you want to make? Visitation rights?"
He ponders a moment. "I would like to make a contract of sorts. It seemed to have worked for Jin and Jungkook—"
     I groan, cutting him off. "For the hundredth time! We will never be anything like Jin and Jungkook. Let it go, Namjoon. Why can't you understand that I don't want you?"
      He nods curtly, disappointed but expecting. "Alright, I get that. This contract will benefit you greatly, though, Jimin. We are already mated so you can't have anyone else. No one will ever take you with a mating mark and a child."
      I cross my arms. Asshole. I choose to remain silent, sulking. So what if it's true.
     He continues. "I would like to offer you to be my mate—really. I want you to move in with me. For the baby. You will have endless amounts of money for anything you want. I'll pamper and cherish you and our child. I'll treat you the way I've always wanted to—the way you desire."
      I scoff. "Says the asshole that raped and forced me to get pregnant. What's with the sudden change of heart now, huh? Just recently you were obsessed to the point of derangement with owning me." I glare. "Mating bite or not, I'm not yours."
      "You know technically as your alpha I have every right to force you to my side but I won't do it. I want you to come to me of your own free will. I'll give you anything you want. Literally anything."
      "How very generous of you." I grumble sarcastically. "What if I want you and Taehyung to just drop dead. Can I have that?"
     Something flickers in his eyes. "You don't have to worry about Taehyung. He has his own problems to worry about."   
      His words are ominous but I don't care. Taehyung isn't my concern any longer anyway. Not after what he did to me. "I don't love you. I don't want to be with you, Namjoon. I'll admit that I used you but you let me do it. I never let you do this shit to me—"
      "Cut the shit, Jimin. You did so! All those trips to the mall and out of the city. All those lavish hotels and shopping sprees...you willingly gave me your body as repayment. We had an arrangement. I'll admit I took my feelings for you to an inappropriate level knowing you harbored no such emotions for me but can you blame me? I fucking love you. I've loved you since the moment I set eyes on you and you used that against me. Played with my head and my heart. Did you really expect no repercussions? I did wrong but you are far from innocent in this, Park Jimin." He growls, losing his temper a bit.
      I draw back, startled. And hurt. Okay, so I really fucked him over. I...hurt him, too, I guess. I played him without giving a shit about his feelings for me over and over.
      "You could have said no." I frown.
      He raises a brow. "You could have, too." We both fall silent as our server brings us fresh coffee and cleans our table a bit. I chew on my bottom lip, staring at him with new eyes.
      He really doesn't look as arrogant and snotty as I first thought. He actually looks pretty upset and disheartened. Why does this even bother me?   
      He licks his lips, tapping his fingers lightly on the table. "Look, can't we just admit we both fucked up? I'll admit to the horrible things I've done and take responsibility. I'm trying. I'm really not the person I've shown you out to be. I just...you really hurt me, Jimin. I guess I felt I needed to hurt you back. It wasn't fair and you're right—I did know what I was getting into with our little arrangements as well as your feeling for my brother. You were always just too good for him, though. I hated the thought of you wanting him."
      "...I thought I wasn't good enough for him?"
     He scoffs. "Have you met that little manipulative shit? He's horrible, I hate having relations to him. I should have never stooped to the levels I did to get you but can you at least understand me? You don't have to forgive me but I want to work on mending something between us. I want to be in you and our baby's life."
      I look away, hating that I do understand him. I hate that I actually feel sympathy to him. God, it has to be the baby. Making me all emotional and shit. Fucking unstable hormones.
      "Fine. I'll consider your...contract or whatever. No promises, though." I stress, still not trusting him.
      He nods fast, smiling so wide his dimples pop out. I hate they my heart actually thumps a little harder at the sight. Stupid alpha.
      No matter what he'll never make me love him or accept him. I'll just tolerate him. For the baby.