We Are Titanium

Where They Move On

****Where They Move On****

It's been 6 months since AJ's birthday party and Derek and I have been going strong. Yes, I sometimes have a dream or two about Jesse and my mind wanders to that time in the car, but that's normal. I've actually moved on and I've fallen in love with Derek. As suspected, I still have those feelings for Jesse but over the time he's been gone, my feelings for Derek have masked them. I want to say I forget but I can't because that would be lying, I can never forget Jesse or what the two of us shared, but I can be distracted from it.

Today is my day off and AJ and I have been making the most of it. We baked cookies and bought a bunch of movies like; Frozen, the Ice Age movies, the Shreks, and etc. We shoved our faces full of chocolatey goodness as we watched all our new movies.

Part of the way through Frozen, we had laid down. AJ curled into my chest and almost immediately fell asleep. I could hear the faint sounds of Idina Menzel singing as I slowly faded away.

"My power flurries through the air into the ground. My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around. One thought crystallized like an icy blast. I'm never going back, the past is in the past! Let it go...."

****

"Beca...Beca." I heard a faint voice as I was slowly shook awake. I slowly opened my eyes to see Derek standing above me and my lips immediately tugged into a smile. "Hey." My voice cracked and he chuckled. "Hey sleepy head. What are you doing?"

"AJ and I were watching tv."

"So I see. Frozen bore you guys?" He asked as he eyed the case. "No, the first 10 minutes of it were cute." He chuckled and sat there, gazing into my eyes. "Are you just going to stare at me or kiss me?" I asked. Again, he chuckled. He leaned his head closer to mine and took my lips in his, slowly moving them in sync with mine.

"Ewwww!" AJ yelled from between us causing us to laugh and break apart. "Ew?" Derek playfully asked as he picked him up. AJ screamed and laughed as Derek flipped him over his shoulder and ran through the house. I watched him disappear into AJ's room, a smile planted on my face. They're so cute.

A few minutes later, Derek emerged from the room, AJ free. "Where's your little monkey?" I asked. "He got distracted by his power rangers, which is good for me." He said before he sprawled across the couch on top of me. "Now I can be distracted by his mother." Without another word, his lips connected to mine.

His tongue ran across my lip, asking me to deepen the kiss, but like every time before this, I denied it. Deepening the kiss leads to intercourse, and after that time in the car, I don't think I'll be ready for a while. I just feel like, after that night, I will be very disappointed. I know it's not fair to Derek, but that's how I feel. Besides, Jesse is the only guy I really know how to please. What if I disappoint him?

Derek obliges and moves his lips to my neck. I enjoyed it and let him continue. Then, his hands kept slipping farther and farther up my shirt. After continuously pushing his hands down, I had to push him away. "Derek, please."

"I'm sorry. I just, I don't understand why you won't let this happen. It's been 6 months, haven't you moved on?"

"Yes, I have-"

"Then why? Do you not love me anymore?"

"Of course I love you. Derek, it's not you, it's me." He rolled his eyes. "No it really is. Jesse...Jesse..."

"Jesse, what?" I took a deep breath. "Jesse's the only person I've ever slept with." I said quickly. This came as a shock to him and I heard him sigh and oh. "He's the only man that I know I can fully satisfy. I don't want to disappoint you."