Ricardo's obsession

Chapter-44

Sarah refused to have any visitors and so all she could do was leave a letter behind with a photo of their unformed baby. Ricardo was working on finding the loop in the case so Sarah could be out and free of charge asap but it seemed like it was going to take time and she all she could do was wait and try not to cause any more problem for her husband.
Johnny was well and fit as ever and was with Selena, she refused to let go of him and it was for the best, it gave Selena the distraction she needed but it also had Lambert from tossing from here to there every now and then. Now that he literally had two handful kids to look after he looked tired yet happy. Iris knew Lambert and Selena had such a chemistry like the characters in the romantic novels did and she hoped it will turn into reality. She was rooting for them but she did not bring it up in conversation as she wanted to observe them further before she could jump to conclusion.
The kids from the orphanage were shifted into better place and were doing well too. The missing kids were found and were undergoing psychotherapy and were better than they arrived.
She mentioned about wanting to visit the children but Ricardo frowned and opposed her idea saying she should not be concerning with them anymore and look after herself more. She thought it was mean of him to be inconsiderate about the kids but she said nothing. This was the only thing to do to try to make up for all that he did for her.
“Why do you think about them all the time? Can we not have our time to ourselves without having the world to bother about?”
She took a deep breath in; it was suffocating when she encountered such moment, moments when an able person chooses to close his eyes towards the needy.
Years ago she was also there, she tried to reach out to all those who she thought was her own but failing she stood there on her own when the volunteers from their native church put her parents in the ground. Not a soul was there to mourn for her beloved parents. Only a week later or so did she receive the condolence letters sent via mail or telegrams. She was cold on the floor sick but no one was there for her, it was a miracle that she was breathing and on her feet.  At those desperate moment all she wanted was a shoulder to cry on, affection and lastly she stoop to even crave sympathy and pity but she received nothing but a deafening silence and the emptiness emotionally and socially.
Her decision of moving was the only thing she was proud of herself for but she could gather the courage to just move too far away from where her parents last remains were.
A warm tear slipped her eyes and he wiped away in a swift motion. He walked to the other side of the kitchen counter and hugged her.
“You ask me why I hold those kids too close to me but why not? They are not at fault for wanting affection nor am I wrong for wanting the same.”
“I can give you all that you want and you should know that you receive far more than just affection for me. Why are you too afraid to open up to me?”
He was right she always had been ungrateful of him, she always had been. It will be such a great disappointment to her parents if they saw how she was living.
“I’m afraid. What I feel for you is not what I ever wanted and I don’t want to one day realize you’ll let go of me when my whole existence begin to revolve around you. I can never sum up to deserve you.”
“What do you feel?”
“I cannot be myself without you. Do you get what I am going through? Every time you say how you feel for me makes me feel confined, too much into it that I should get myself out of but then I won’t.”
“Am I that much of a trouble to you?” he asked in a faint whisper which made her look at him in anguish. His voice making him seem like he had almost given up.
“I love you.”
“You shouldn’t.”
She swallowed back her words. He was right she shouldn’t have, she was expecting too much from life by thinking that it will give her the chance to feel more human. She had braced herself to take the expected blow like life always threw at her and she was used to it.
“I’m sorry.”
She pulled away from him and was walking past him but he held her arm and pulled her back to him.
His worried eyes met her teary ones. Those beautiful eyes only deserved happiness and love. He sat her on his lap and kissed her head then her cheeks. He wanted to know just what she was meaning to say but decided to let go of it as he somehow succeeded in diverting her mind and she looked more stress less and it was better for her to be happy and as beautiful as always.
“You shouldn’t force yourself to love me. I will love you for both our worth, just stay with me and let me love you.”
“I love you. I do.”
She wrapped her hands around his neck and hugged him tight, too afraid to let go of him. Now that she finally gathered the courage to go against all that held her back she was going to strive back at it. She knew Ricardo will always be there for her and all her fears and worries were in vain.
“I love you for loving me back and for gifting me the most beautiful gifts this life ever had to offer.”
She kissed him on the lips once, then twice.
“Which gifts?”
“Our little one (running his hand over her slight bump) and your love.”
“You will never lessen your love for us will you?”
“I’ll be damned if I ever do that.”
She was happy and she felt his happiness too which only added to hers. Once a soul very afraid to love was loving with all her might and she was happy. She felt it and it was warm and soothing.
“I love you.”
“I love you too and more than you do.”
“You can never say that.”
“I know there always is one who loves more than the other.”
“Let’s just prove ourselves for the rest of our lives, but for now we need to get out of here and feed the mother of your child as she is about to pass out of hunger.”
The smile on his face faded the moment she mentioned her hunger.
“You should stop skipping meals.”
“And who is to be blamed?”
He kept her busy the whole night and before it was lunch time they were rushing down to the police station only to return empty handed. Ricardo promised her that he will find a way to make her meet Sarah and her safety.
She took a warm bath then walked back to the kitchen to find him setting the table for them. she never knew he was a chef too but given that there was no sign of the helper around it must have been him who cooked and a smile crept her lips.
He tapped the fork on the glass lightly gathering her attention.
“No. I did not do the cooking, I excused the maid minutes ago.”
“Are you a psychic? How did you know what I was thinking about?”
“You had that look on your pretty face.”
“What look?”
“Look that was warmed by the thought of your husband cooked for her.”
She laughed and approached him. He was impossible and he was hers.
“I love you husband.”
He wrapped his arm around her tiny waist. his insides bloomed at hearing her say those words he so longed for. Now that he finally was hearing it he could not get enough of it.
“I love hearing those words from your heart and through your super tempting lips.”
She could feel his junio… no not junior, it felt to wrong to call his organ as his junior was the one growing in her.
“I will love you more if you’ll allow me to eat without the fear of being eaten.”
He laughed and pulled the chair for her then leaned to her ear level whispering
“I love how you manage to put thoughts into my mind with those innocent words of yours.”
“We’re about to eat you seriously cannot and shouldn’t be thinking about that at such hour.”
“You are the living breathing proof of why I am being the way I am.”
She felt her cheeks go warm but it was lunch time and only food could satiate her or will it?
He kissed her head and took the chair next to hers, he served her the dishes and she looked like she was dying to jump in but the moment she put the 1st spoonful of the steak in her mouth her whole expression changed and she looked at him with her lips sealed but unwilling to chew.
“Is it not good?”
She looked around and finding the waste-bin she spit the un-chewed steak out. washed her mouth with clean water then came back and took her seat.
“I believe it must be very tasty but I just could not…
“That’s okay. You don’t have to force yourself with anything and you can ask for anything you feel like eating and I mean anything.”
“Sorry I did not want to be rude.”
“You were not and thank you for not pretending to be okay with what you are not okay with.”
He put the plate away from her and she was about to say something but held back and he knew what she was about to say so he put the plate on top of his. He noticed how she never wasted food and she only took as much as she could eat. She was very disciplined when it came to food. She was a firm believer of no grain should be wasted for the sake of ettequitte. He noticed how she always gave food from their kitchen to his men before they sat for dinner or lunch and there was only enough  for them to be full with without wasting. Only once did she let the dining table be and maybe that was when she notice how much he took for dinner or lunch and since then their table only consisted of enough food for two but he always pretended to be unaware of it. If it was sexy for a woman to enjoy her food without being picky it was sexier when a woman knew the value of every grain and that woman was his wife, his Iris.
“You should take another serving.” She said hesitating that he was going to eat her leftover but he put a mouthful and smiled at her.
“It’s very good indeed and why take another serving when I got a very edible one here.”
“I already ate from it.”
“It is sexier to share food with your loved one.” He winked at her and she smiled at him. He was literally too good for her and was just proving that with every deed of his.
She took her time to decide what she wanted for dinner only to settle for the mashed potatoes with jalapeno and the garlic bread.
He noticed how she was undicisive of what she wanted and made a mental note to instruct the maid to consult with Iris for the next meal and the rest. He cannot have his pregnant wife unfed and deprived of the nutrients her body required for herself and their young one.
Iris was worried for what happened during lunch nothing she saw was up to her taste and she could go on this way without having the proper nutrients in her and it worried her more by the thought of how every little edibles made her want to puke her guts out. It was not going to be easy if her tastebuds could not keep up with the nutritional requirements of her body.