Good omens one shots

Flirting

Aziraphale and Crowley where sat in a rather small coffee shop, a very nice one at that. "I'm just going to the bathroom." Started Crowley to the angel as he got up from the small circular table for two. As the toilet door opened and closed, aziraphale heard the sound of foot steps approaching him. "Hey." A low voice said. Aziraphale looked up to see a man leaning one armed against the table in a rather intimidating position. "Oh, um hello- may I help you?" Aziraphale asked politely but his voice still trembling. Come back Crowley. He pleaded in his mind as the man stared into his blue eyes. "So," he said pulling up a chair "what's your name." He asked flirtatiously. He reached out a hand to touch the blondes bow tie and began to twiddle it around his fingers. "Please, step back." He said timidly trying to stand his guard. Come on aziraphale, your the angel of the eastern gate, he is just a man! He advanced closer until he could feel his hot breath lingering on his face, it lapped again this pale, delicate skin as he spoke words in whispers. "Why don't you come with me," he whispered "I'll show you a good time- you look pretty." He said.

Suddenly, the bathroom door flung open. They both turned their heads, aziraphale clearly very uncomfortable. He stood in a menacing stance and then marched aggressively over to the man. "What. Are. You. Doing." He snarled. "Relax, he was enjoying it- you don't deserve him." He said tauntingly. Crowley's face went blank. Oh no. Aziraphale thought. He did not know what a huge mistake he had just made. "You think." He said advancing on the man, "that my boyfriend would love you." He spat. The man shrunk in fear and cowered. "How could anyone love sssscum sssuch asssss your sssself." He hissed. He was furious. The man in desperation took a swing at Crowley. All he succeeded to do was knock off Crowley's glasses- as Crowley grabbed his hand mid punch. He twisted his knuckles back and he cried in pain. Crowley threw another inhumanly strong punch at him which knocked him to the floor. He opened his eyes to see piercing yellow serpentine ones staring daggers back at him. He scurried away backwards into a corner on the floor. "Please, I'm sorry I shouldn't have- you are good enough for him I- I" he stuttered as Crowley stopped. "Good." He said clapping his hands together. "Wait- really?" He asked getting up. "Just one more thing-" Crowley said grabbing his shirt and pushing him against the wall "if you ever ssstep foot near my angel again, I will track you down and you won't get off lightly- understood?" He asked. He whimpered and nodded as Crowley let go. He aloud his face to morph into one of a terrifying hell hound and hissed violently at him.

He ran out and stopped once more out side of the window to look back at them. Crowley was now leaning over the table kissing Aziraphale passionately. Crowley spotted him and shot daggers at him. He ran away and they never saw the man again.
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Umm- that wasn't how I planned this to go- that was um- more violent than intended.