The Conjuction House (mindless behavior)(book 2 of drama)

Chapter 29-k_thax

Jade's P.O.V.

Ever get that really guilty feeling in the bottom of your stomach when you know you did a horrible thing, and regret it? Don't you wish that you could relive the past day because of that guilty pleasure you recieved?

I have that exact same feeling. It got so bad that I couldn't sleep. Connor slept peacefully beside me with an innocent smile. I smiled, but somehow, the guilt just wouldn't go away.

I looked at my alarm clock, and it was 2am. There was a pen and note pad on my bed side table.

As I got up to move, Connor shifted in his sleep and held me closer and tighter. I slowly moved out of the bed and quietly put on my robe. I tip toed to my dresser and started throwing the clothes in my suit case again. Once I had everything packed, I walked into the bathroom and took an ice cold shower. It reminded me of the hot sex I just had and needed to cool down from it. The freezing cold water also brought back memories of my mother not paying her bills on time. I put on some sweats and walked back into my bedroom. I continued to look at Connor while he was asleep, and thought, maybe I should just stay here with him. But the other voice in my mind told me to leave, just for a night or two, to give each other space. I really didn't want to leave him, so I sat on my bed, having a fight in my mind, trying to decide if I should go or stay.

I took the pen and note pad and began to write a note to Connor as to why I was leaving.

Dear Connor,
It really breaks my heart, but I have to leave. The truth is, I know you want a divorce to be with the whore you work with, so I'm going through with it. I hate seeing you unhappy and if its because of me, I would do anything to see your smile again. You were my entire life for the past 18 years, and helped me raise two kids. I couldn't have done it without you, but now it's time for me to let you go. I'll love you forever and always,
Jade

I put the note on the pillow next to where he was sleeping, and where I was once laying. I gave him one last kiss good bye and grabbed my luggage. I took it to the car and looked back. I couldn't just leave Ray and Kay hanging like that, so I went back inside and wrote them letters too.

Dear Ray,
I'm sorry I have to leave you hanging like this, but it's for the best. I'm leaving because I love you, and I screwed up your entire life. Please, if I don't come back, take care of your sister, and daughter and unborn niece or nephew . I'm so sorry, but it's time for me to let go of the past, live in the present and think about the future. I love you sooo much first born,
Mom

Dear Kay,
I know I haven't been the best mother in the past, but I've been so focused on being a better mom than Amy, that I totally forgot that I'm feeling exactly like you right now. I'm so sorry that I'm turning out to be Amy and that I only made your life worse, but you finally get what you've wanted; me out of your life. I just want you to know, that I love you and I always will and always have. Please be an even better mother to your child and you'll prevent all of this drama from happening betwern you and Prince. Speaking of you and him, keep him close, because you wouldn't want him or her growing up like me, a person who looked for their father their entire life. Just remember to keep your head up and stay positive, except for pregnancy tests. Anyway, I love you more than you could ever possibly imagine baby girl, love,
Mom

I put the notes on their pillows as well and kissed their foreheads.I walked out of the house for good this and never looked back, because it would only hurt more.

Kay's P.O.V.

Sunlight peered through my window, when I turned, thinking that my mother would still be holding me in her arms, but instead she was gone, and I found a note.