Again

Moving Through Time

Fall 1996

Longest Chapter  I written so far.

Janet

Trigger warning: Depression, mention of rape, Miscarriage

After releasing janet. in 1993, Janet also starred in Poetic Justice with Tupac. She'd also married Rene, which was a push from her father. 1993 was the beginning of one of the toughest times in Janet's life. After the marriage and tour, Janet just wasn't happy she couldn't deal with life anymore. She would wake up and cry all day and couldn't really figure out why. Her husband was a jackass and bordered on being abusive. She was just unhappy and fell into a deep depression. It took her a long time to get over it. Years to be exact.

Janet struggled for years on autopilot and really didn't know what to do. As the years went on Rene became physically and mentally abusive. One night Rene came in, high of off something and proceeded to beat Janet then rape her. That experience was traumatizing. It was something that Janet never wanted to live through again. Rene went to rehab and got better. As soon as he got out he went right back to the drugs and drinking. It was a continuous cycle that Janet no longer wanted to be apart of. While Rene was in rehab for the last time during their marriage, Janet found out she was pregnant and it was not a happy time as one might think. It sent Janet back into a depression that she couldn't shake.

Something that was supposed to be happy was causing her to be stressed because she didn't want to raise a child with an addict father. One Sunday morning she woke up and was getting ready to see Rene at the rehab even though she really didn't want to go. Janet walked into the bathroom and began experiencing sharp abdominal pains. All she could do was sit and breathe, that's when she noticed the blood. It seemed as if it was almost pouring out. She called Joey and he came rushing in. He picked her up bridal style and rushed her to the hospital.

Randy and Katherine met them at the hospital.

"Joey, hun. What's going? Where is all this blood from?"

"Momma K, I can't tell you. Please go talk to J." His voice was so stressed and all he kept doing was shaking his head.

"Alright. Joey I'll go, what the room number? Randy stay with him please."

"It's 332, she needs you."

Momma K walked to Janet's room and saw her daughter curled up in the fetal position. She laid her hand on Janet's cheek and whispered "I love You."

"I love you too, Momma."

"What happened baby?"

"I lost the baby. Is it wrong that I feel relief?"

"Baby, why didn't you tell me you were pregnant? I...mean...when...?"

"Momma before he went to rehab he raped me. I can't even look at him. He became abusive when he was on drugs. I got pregnant when he raped me. I didn't want to bring a child into this world with a father like that." Janet cried for the first time since learning she was pregnant, but they were happy tears of relief.

"Momma I don't want to seem insensitive but I really did not want a child like this."

"Well baby God took care of that for you. What are you going to do about Rene?"

"I don't know yet. This can't get out to the press Momma. Can you call Kelly and have her do damage control, please."

"I will, baby. I understand how you're feeling. I just want to make sure that you are ok."

"I'm not but I will be soon."

It took about another year and a half for Janet to get her depression under control. In that time she wrote songs and recorded so much music. She distanced herself from Rene, they were even living in separate houses. So many times she wanted to call Toni just to hear her voice but she resisted. Her life was so complicated now and she wasn't ready to face Toni.