The Real Me

Live your own life

"He has what?"

"I know you didn't expect it from such a seem to be happy kid. The rest you will hear from him. Thank you so much for staying by his side and bringing even a little joy in his life." He smiled.
That smile wasn't something I could understand. I couldn't even imagine what he had to go through to smile like that.

Note: Post traumatic and stress disorder aka PTSD is a mental health condition that's triggered by a terrifying event - either experiencing or witnessing it. (Thanks Google.)

We both bid our goodbyes and went separate ways, I had to meet Ben after this.
I had to.

So I called him. He received the call and said, "Look who's calling~".

"We need to talk and this is serious. Meet me at the park right now."

"Seems serious. Alright I'll be there in a few." And I hung up.

I was just staring at the kids playing and having the best time of their life. I wanna be a kid again, I thought. His uncle's words ringing on my mind.

"So what did you wanna talk about?" He sat on the bench.

"I met your uncle and he told me that you have PTSD, but he didn't tell me the whole story. So I'm expecting to hear it from you."

"So this is what it's about.. I'm not ready and you definitely know I might get an anxiety attack right here if I force myself to remember those incidents again. I'll definitely tell you when I'm ready enough."

"I understand and I'll be waiting." I could see that he really needed those words.
Yeah, good job Sin, asking a PTSD victim to remember his traumas just so you could satisfy your curiosity.

"So how does it feel to win? You could've been a little merciful. I wanted to join the gang so bad." That was a good topic change. I should learn from him.

"I know you only wanted to join cause of me. Don't bother doing things you don't like because of me, live your own life."

"Says the one who lives according to her parents." He smiled subtly.
"Also are you coming to the picnic?" Another topic change but wait- picnic?

"What picnic? Since when did our school become so considerate enough to spare us from constant hell?"

"Were you zoning out in class? They said we are going for a picnic the day after tomorrow. Are you coming or not?"

"You are asking as if I have all the freedom in the world. I have parents whom I need to ask for permission you know. Lemme ask them real quick."

"What- but I'm not ready-"

"Ready for what?" Like dude- what???

"To introduce myself as your boyfriend. What else?" He smirked.

"Your smirks will get you killed someday or at least I hope so." He pouted and I called my mom.

"What is it? You know I'm busy."
Clears throat, WHY THE FUCK DID I PUT IT ON LOUD SPEAKER!!?

"Yeah I know, but the teacher is right beside me and is asking if I'm going for the school picnic. What should I say?"
I am the biggest liar ever.

"Give the phone to your teacher."

"What-?"
Don't stutter. Don't stutter.

"Give the phone to the teacher." My face said 'I fucked up.'

Ben snatched it from my hand and said, "Yes, this is Sin's teacher." His voice was exactly like my teacher- Wtf-

"Can she skip it? The thing is both of us will be working this week so her sister would be alone."

"No, it's mandatory. They will be given certain tasks there and she might fail if she skips it." Fail!? This guy is ridiculous!!

"Oh then, she'll be going, no worries. Now if you'll excuse me, I have an emergency surgery."

"Thank you for your time. Have a good day!"

I was in a daze.
Teach me your smooth skills, sensei.

"Just how much did you lie to be this much of a pro that too with a straight face."

"Well you won't fail but you'll regret missing out on all the fun. Doesn't matter if I have to lie to see you smile, I'll happily do it your majesty."

"You know my parents more than me and that scares me even more. But I'm going so might as well have fun!"

"Exactly."

And so folks, pack your bags, we are going to have some fun!