They Don't Know About Us

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"Hey are you okay?" Jessie asks as she walks into the living room back from a run. I lick my lips but nod my head slightly, "Y-yeah I just want to talk to you". She furrows her eyebrows as she wipes from sweat from her face with her sleeve, "Is everything okay?" Once again I nod but this time a bit more certain as I hold out a hand for her to take, "Yeah I just really need to talk to you".

She raises an eyebrow at me but takes my hand as I gently pull her towards the couch beside me, "What do you want to talk about?" She sits down beside me sitting cross-legged facing me giving me her full attention. I feel my hands start to sweat as I wipe them on my joggers as I take a deep breath trying to calm down a bit but it does little to calm my nerves. I'm guessing Jessie sees this as she takes one of my hands in hers and starts to massage the back of my hand with her thumb, "It's okay. Just breath and take your time. I'm right here Lee".

I nod and take another deep breath , "Thanks freckles". She smiles, "It's okay. Now what did you want to tell me?" I play with her fingers and smile subconsciously when I see the ring on her finger which gives me a bit more comfort, "I've been talking to Corey...about my nightmares. And she thinks that they keep happening because I keep trying to ignore what happened and forget it happened....." Jessie licks her lips and nods along showing she understands, "Okay". I pursue my lips and let a low breath out of my lips, "Well...she thinks that it would help...if I talked to you about them...that I would finally start to come to term with what happened and they would finally stop". She nods as she eyes scan over my face, "Okay so you want to talk about it now".

I nod slowly, "Yeah I want to talk to you about it. I've been putting this off for too long. I need to deal with this. I need them to stop".  Jessie nods, "Okay okay". She shuffles closer to me not letting go of my hand.

It's as if it hits me all at once. I close my eyes and take a shaky breath, "I-it starts off a-at t-the field". I try to speak again but my voice cracks, "T-then t-then". Jessie squeezes my hand, "It's okay. It's okay". I shake my head, "I need to-" but Jessie rubs my back soothingly, "Will it help if I tell you about my nightmares first?" I look her straight in the eyes and I can see how they don't have their usual sparkle. This time they're slightly dark and more reluctant. I swallow hard but nod making her give me a small watery smile, "Okay". She takes her own deep breath before looking down at our hand which are now entwined, "They would always start out with us at the pitch". I could see she was struggling herself but she swallowed it down and continued on, "It's the two of us in the middle of the field just like at the match". She chuckles a little bit as she wipes under her eyes, "And your flirting with me in the middle of the game. Just making some comments as you usually do with that small wink you always do in the middle of the match which frustrates me to no end".

I can't help but chuckle with her as she take another breath, "Then you run off after a ball leaving me to stare after you". Her smile disappears as she closes her eyes thinking about the nightmare, "Then there's a gunshot. And I turn to see him standing on the field but it's like everyone disappeared as if it's just him and me". She takes a shaky breath herself while I squeeze her hand letting her know I'm here to which she thankfully squeezes back, "H-he points the gun at me and I just stand there terrified. No matter how much I want to run I just can't. I close my eyes and I hear another gunshot. I open my eyes expecting to see me shot b-but instead I-I see you standing in front of me".

A sob breaks out as tears start to stream down her face. She tries to clean them away but they keep pouring down her cheeks. I pull her closer to me laying her legs over my own as I hold her close while her arms wrap around my neck as she hugs into my side. Her head tucked safely into the crook of my neck. "What happens next?" I ask quietly as I rub her back up and down. She take a deep breath before breathing out again as I feel her breath fan the column of my neck, "Y-you collapse in front of me as I try to catch you and I shake you trying to keep you awake. But right as you fall asleep you give me one last smile and say "I love you". I scream at you to wake up but it doesn't work".