75. Hate that i love you

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"You know exactly what to do
So that I can't stay mad at you
For too long, that's wrong
But I hate it
You know exactly how to touch
So that I don't wanna fuss and fight no more
Said I despise that I adore you
And I hate how much I love you, boy (yeah)
I can't stand how much I need you (I need you)
And I hate how much I love you, boy (oh whoa)
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you so (oh)"

~ne-yo and riri

Kennedy banks pov
4am

I slowly open my eyes to see that I'm in a dark room and feel my self drenched in sweat

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I slowly open my eyes to see that I'm in a dark room and feel my self drenched in sweat .

I walk over to find a light switch and hope when I turn it on this whole day will start over .

I wanted for it to be me and true back on the vainity trying on lashes all over again and for the fight with Von to never happen .

But as I flick the light switch on I realize that this is my reality and Von really did throw me in this random room to 'calm me down ' . As if I'm five years old and we're not In a relationship.

I don't remember what exactly happened but I do remember seeing Von with Kitty and me hitting him , after that every things a blur .

I knew I was bound to snap one day about every little thing thats been building up while I been out here , since I'm basically prohibited from speaking my opinion without it turning into a fight .

I just didn't think I would snap on Von . Like literally snap ! I know I've slapped him before but this time it was more than just a normal swat .

Not only did I check myself about disrespecting his children , apologize to him and Asian about my past actions , but I also brought him back those colorful burgers from the sugar factory and I gladly would've ate those on the way back home !

I don't even know where his loyalty lies anymore .

When I came to LA I thought it would be us against everybody else like it was before . But it seems like the life he has established out here is way different than the one in Chicago .

I've adapted to the kids , and juju and cisco living with him . But Kitty coming over here so they can have romantic candle lit lunches together ? I will never adjust to that .

So no I don't regret snapping on him , I regret Kitty holding king so that I couldn't get her to . She knew exactly how I would react if I seen them together and it's almost like Von was sneaking behind my back .

I don't even know what's gotten into him lately . But my Von would never do that and when I said the word , Kitty would have disappeared. I guess LA Von is different .

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