Purposely accidental

Ashton

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             Savannah wants to be my girlfriend. Do I want that? I'm not sure. I have to talk to Lacey about it. She will know the answer, she always does. Yes. This is the right decision. Ask Lacey and she will tell me what to do. The thought of having a proper girlfriend makes me anxious. I'm sixteen now, I know what a girlfriend means at this age. There will be touching and sex probably. The thought of being with anyone other than Lacey like that scares me.

I mean, Lacey sleeps in my bed sometimes and I can't help but feel how I do about her. Whenever she is asleep I steal kisses on her head. I just lay there sometimes and just simply smell her lovely hair, her scent relaxes me. I've been meaning to ask her if she needs more practice kissing but I chicken out. Plus I don't want her to think she needs practice. Oh! Why is this so difficult?

I'm waiting in my room for Lacey. I texted her earlier to come over. I'm nervous as anything. But I have to ask her what she thinks about Savannah and I being together. If I could just get one hint whether she likes me or not, I would know what to do. I know I've always said I've never seen Lacey in THAT way, but truthfully she's all I think about. I want her to be all mine. I want to be her first in everything and she mine.

I hear her feet coming down the hall and my nerves kick up a notch. When she walks through my bedroom door all my anxiousness fades and I sigh. "Hey Lace!"

"Hey Ash!" Lacey bounces into my room and joins me on my bed. "You wanted to see me?" She asks hesitantly.

"I always want to see you silly! I'd move you in if your parents would let me."

She smacks my chest playfully. "Oh you would not. You would get sick of me before you know it!"

"No I wouldn't. I'd never get too much of you sunshine!"

Lacey blushes and I tuck a hair behind her ear and she pulls away from my touch. "What about Savannah?"

"What about her?" I say in confusion.

"She wouldn't like you touching me like that Ash."

"But I've always touched you Lacey..." I shake my head with a furrowed brow. "Anyway that's what I want to talk to you about. Savannah asked me to be her boyfriend and I told her I needed to talk to you first."

"Why would you say that!?! Now she is going to be mad at me!" Lacey shrieks.

"Because I talk to you about everything Lacey. I need to know what you think about this whole thing. Should I just say yes or should I be with someone else? Do you know anyone who is better for me?" Please say you, please say you!

"I...uhh... I think that she is nice and she likes you alot. I don't understand why my opinion matters."

"Lacey I could never be with someone you don't approve of. You are the most important person in my life. I just need to know there's not a chance of anything else before I go ahead and be with her." I want to be with you. I want to be your first. I can't say that though... What happens if she says no? I can't lose her, it would kill me.

Lacey is quiet for a long time and I just wait patiently. "I don't know Ash, it's a lot of pressure. I just want you to be happy and if she makes you happy then I say go for it."

"But you make me happy Lacey."

"That's different."

"It is?" I ask, completely confused.

"Yeah. We're best friends. Of course I make you happy."

"Oh... Right. Okay then. I'll tell her yes then?"