The Merchant's Daughter

Chapter 27: The Nightmares

The following day she returned to her normal routine, expect the cooking part.
She went to the kitchen in the morning and told Mrs. Maggie that she's free to organize the meals as she did before. There was a wicked look of victory in Maggie's eyes that Helena decided to overlook.

When she went to Mrs. Donavan for coffee, she was so quiet and was actually hoping that Mrs. Smith would join them to fill in. The door opened and to her surprise, it was Dalton, she tried not to look affected by his coming even though she was avoiding him.
Dalton: how are you today Mother?
Emilia: I'm fine Dalton... what's wrong with your eyes too? I was just asking Helena cause i saw her eyes very tired... are you both fine?
Helena smiled, when he didn't answer: of course, Mrs. Donavan... the weather was beautiful last night and we stayed out watching the stars.
Dalton smiled at her statement: yes mother... it were special moments.
Dalton couldn't help feeling Helena's pain: actually mother, i came to take Helena for another walk... why don't you join us... you hardly leave your room.
Emilia as usual would say tomorrow but she never does: that would be lovely dear... but we keep it tomorrow.
Dalton stood and took Helena's arm pulling her and taking her out of the room: tomorrow then Mother; we will come to take you for a walk... i want you to move out of this room.
Helena slowly walked with him as he guided her to the bedroom... she didn't understand when he started changing into his sleeping clothes.
Helena: what are we doing?
Dalton: change into your nightgown... we both need to sleep.
Helena: No, I don't... you do whatever... I'm out of here.
Dalton blocked her way and spoke with his normal commanding voice: get your clothes changed and get into bed.
Helena stood looking in his eyes not moving which made him take her arm... he slowly turned her and opened her dress from the back... he spoke slowly as she didn't move inside his firm grip around her waist: it was nice you didn't go moaning to Mother when she asked why we looked tired.
Helena was taken by his deep voice into her ears while his hold of her completely calmed her resistance: parents worry all the time... it wouldn't have been fair to her.
She was now in her under dress when he turned her and looked at her lips, neck and upper chest that was glowing in his eyes.
His gaze confused her as she moved slowly to the bathroom to change... he was in bed when she came in looking so tired with his eyes closed... she went under the covers and to her surprise she slept in a second.

Shortly after she wake up crying in his arms... she couldn't stop herself as he sat down and rested his back to the bed head and grabbed her body to take her back in his chest.. He started whispering softly in her ears: its fine Helena... it was a dream... you're here... you're safe.
She stopped crying as she felt warm in his arms and whispered: what happened?
Dalton: you were crying in your sleep like every single night and calling upon your father... One time you say I'm sorry Papa, please forgive me and other times you say I'm falling Papa help me.
He breathed in her ears: what's scaring you so much Helena? I wish you tell me...
He paused then continued with bitterness: but i am so worried if i know it takes us apart more and more... i cannot be involved in any of your family's issues... i already have a terrible heavy load on my own.
Helena wished she could tell him, but answered dryly: after last night, i will never ever tell you anything. I'm just cold please.

Dalton wished he would let her tell him, but the risk that he hates her and kicks her out of his life was too much to take, by now.
He pulled her more inside him, tightening the covers more around them: cold and scared... come here... hush now, close your eyes.
They stayed for a while, till she spoke sadly: I'm sorry I wake you up with my nightmares... I can go sleep in the other room.
He moved his lips touching her ear: you are not getting used to my warmth yet?
Helena was trying to beat the effect of his touch: I thought you hated it, sleeping by myside, i mean?
Dalton: you whisper every night in your sleep that you're cold and scared and you're not back to sleep till I hold & comfort you... i would feel bad leaving you.
Helena was puzzled at how she cannot remember this happening every night but she didn't want to sound ungrateful or doubting him. For some reason she was getting so relaxed till he started moving slightly: I'm so hungry, you're not?
Helena was enjoying their closeness: don't feel like getting dressed and going down. I'm so exhausted... can I just stay here please?
Dalton loved having her in his arms: it's amazing how cute you look when you're exhausted and not fighting!
He was smiling which annoyed her instantly... she left bed and went to the bathroom to wash up and change.
When she returned to the room he wasn't there; she changed her clothes and put on the yellow dress that she thought would take away the tiredness off her face.
When he opened the door, she was looking beautiful, he stared at her for a second: I ordered food here so you don't need to go down.
Helena laughed lightly: I got dressed so you'd have a full meal cause you were hungry!

He took her hand softly and smiled: is it very difficult for you to always be...?
He wanted to say sweet, but he paused as he discovered his soft tone... she was almost smiling when she too caught herself softening up but was dying to ask him what he wanted to say before freezing himself as usual.

He left her hand coldly instead and they both went down to the dining room. They ate silently, the food was plain and lacking taste. He ate out of hunger while she ate only a little.

She stood after dinner: can I go for a little walk?
Dalton looked at her with a little smile: so you think because you were nice to my mother I will agree to everything you want to do?
Helena calmly: there's no relation... I just need to move a bit, specially I didn't like the food.
Dalton smiled: yes, I'm afraid it was below average tonight, i will get the cook back... you're not asking Maggie to cook bad just to prove your point... are you?!
Helena surprised: is that how you see me?
Dalton was full of bitter anger as he replied: don't you all women excel into plotting? You are all deceitful creatures by nature!
Helena swallowed difficultly: I wish I could ask you who was that woman who did that to you... but this will only take us to another fight... I'm tired of fighting.
His face changed as he stood angrily and grabbed her arm while she was passing beside him: you are all alike... you are born with deceit in your blood.
Helena couldn't help it and snapped back: you're just cold and cruel... every single time I try to defend you inside my head you prove me wrong... let go of me.

She left him standing in the dining room and went down to the garden. She tried to walk up and down in front of the house which was the only lit area... it was another moonless night and she didn't want to think of him anymore.. But she thought of her nightmares.
Why was she always calling up for her father? What about her mother? Why wouldn't she call for her? Was she so convinced that her mother was behind herself and so helpless?

Dalton was fuming with anger... what does this child know of life and deceitful women... all those prostitutes who told him all the love words in the world so he'd pay them a little extra.. Or the ones who were willing to please him in any possible way just to have him as a regular customer... Or his own wife who dared to run away with another man... he went up to his room feeling heavy hearted, when he saw her from the window pacing in front of the house in her yellow dress looking like a butterfly in the dark night.
He caught himself smiling not even sure why... is it her pride or her fighting soul... but then the smile disappeared as he thought of her last words... is he really being cold and cruel? He's the one hurting, how can she see him like that?

It took her ages to go back to her room... he was already asleep she thought, she moved slowly in the room, changed and slept beside him... as she closed her eyes; she so much regretted telling him he was cruel and cold; she had no right! She doesn't even know what could possibly made him so harsh, nothing other than what Mrs. Smith keeps telling her that he had his share of pain!