Are We Enemies, Or Lovers?

cocoon

Louis POV

After harry left, I contemplated following him or calling him even. But I realized, I don't remember a time where I got mad at him and left him behind. But he always does this to me, and I'm tired of running after him.

How pathetic am I to be breaking over someone who doesn't even care about me? Who only wants to have monopoly over my body.

He gets to fuck everything with a pulse and I go on one date, and suddenly I'm damaged good?

The circle keeps repeating itself, and it's my fault honestly. I let stan use me for my body, and now I'm letting harry do the same thing.

I thought I loved Stan, but really he was just the first boy willing to touch my dick and that made me confuse infatuation for love. I did love him as a friend, but I was never inlove with him.

I see that now.

The pain is infinitely more crippling this time around.

I let myself get attached to Harry, because I thought if anything he did in fact want me physically, but now it's like repulse him.

And that thought alone, kills me.

So i did what any rational teenager would do, I cried myself to sleep.

***

"Louis honey, wake up" my mother shouted outside my door.

"I'm not going to school today" I yelled back.

She gently opened my door, "why?" She asks walking towards my bed.

Apparently crying oneself to sleep, results in a killer headache. I may as well be hungover.

"I'm just, I'm not feeling up to it mom... my head is killing me" I say, hiding under the covers.

"What's wrong darling?" She asks, sitting on my bed.

"I don't want to talk about it" I mumble.

"But, I thought you had a game tomorrow and needed to pratice?"

"Yeah well, I might not go to school tomorrow either"

"Louis Tomlinson, you will not miss two days of school without a good reason" she says, all traces of gentleness gone.

"Fiiine, I'll go to school tomorrow"

She sighs, seemly giving up on the interrogation "Do you need anything?"

"Pain killers, I have a headache" I whine.

She rips the covers off me, "Are you hungover?! When I came back from work you were home, how could you be hungover" she snaps.

I turn to glare at her, and she gets a look on my red eyes and tormented face, "I am not hungover mother, I just have a headache"

She looks at me, concerned..."are you sure you don't want to tell me what's wrong?" She asks, almost pleading.

"Positive, now can i have my covers back please?" I ask, trying to not catch an attitude with my mom. After all She didn't do anything to me.

"Ok baby, I'll bring you breakfast and some Pain killers" she says, kissing my forehead.

"Thank you mom" I say pulling the covers over my head.

***

The pain killers knocked me out, I wake up and it's the middle of the day.

I pick up my phone to find a couple of missed calls from liam, a few texts from zayn and Niall. Another missed call from Ed.

Nothing from harry.