Our Toxic Love

Chapter Eight

*Ariana's POV*

The first few days were easy-also fun. No one recognized me at all and a few boys even attempted to flirt with me... though I don't know if I handled that one well.

But today is day eleven. By the time everyone established that the new girl's name is Ariana Dales, the puzzle was pieced together and another secret one of my secrets was spilled.

I apply a little eyeliner and try to ignore the fact that everyone probably knows who I am by now. I can't pretend to be that confident new girl anymore. Everyone's probably going to howl at me the second I step foot in school.

I stare at my mirror. When I'm sure that my long eyelashes are full, my eyes lined, and my lips are darker, I grab my new black school bag and head downstairs

"Ariana?" my father questions, his bright brown eyes wide with confusion.

I haven't seen him for a few days now. I've mostly been avoiding him because... well, because our relationship really isn't something I want to work on anymore. I've given up on trying to be his daughter.

"Yes?" I respond.

"Is it really you?" he asks.

I roll my eyes. "No, shit."

My eyes widen at the use of the word shit with him but he seems too distracted with my transformation to say anything about it.

There's one thing I hate about being the way I am now. It's that my personality has evolved along with my appearance. I'm not too shy anymore and now that I know I look good, I can't help but feel overwhelmed by my self esteem.

I shake the thought out of my head and decide that I'll work on that later. For now, I have to focus one thing, and one thing only-and that's attracting Ethan.

I'm not fond of the whole thing Danielle was planning of course, but honestly, I don't see any other option. I want to rid myself of the constant pain. I want him to be embarrassed and hurt too and understand that what he does to people isn't something to be taken lightly or as a joke. Someone has to do that. Why not me?

I look down at my untouched breakfast. I think I just lost my appetite. I pour the cereal and milk into the sink and ignore the irritated look on my father's face as I do so. I leave the house and take a fifteen minute walk to my school.

All eyes are on me while I walk to my locker. I really hope my face isn't red. When I see Danielle going in the opposite direction, I almost trip as I grab her arm to stop her.

"They know," I say, struggling to breathe. "They know it's me now. This is so stupid; I don't know what I was thinking. I mean, the least I could've done was change my name or something. How did we not think this through?"

Danielle holds up a hand. "Shit, dude, breathe. This is all part of the plan, okay? There's nothing to worry about just-"

"How?" I demand. "By lunchtime, everyone's going to be cussing at me and I'll be right back where I started two weeks ago. What do we do now?"

"Calm down. You're missing the point-again. This isn't about starting fresh and being a new person. This is about finding that bastard's heart and ripping it apart." She laughs. "Heh, that rhymed. Anyway, just try to get him to notice you more. That's all you have to do for now. Got it?"

I nod nervously. "Got it."
___________________

Ethan howls at me. A few people bark. Some even laugh. Matt just sits there, grinning at me like an idiot-which he is. I really am back to where I started. But it doesn't matter.

I plop down on a seat and place my tray on the table. I'm in the cafeteria. Just when I thought my day was going okay, Ethan just had to start it all.

I play with my plate of spaghetti. I don't seem to be affecting Ethan at all. He's supposed to be attracted to me but all he does is treat me like shit. I try to get Danielle's words to cling to my head: this is all part of the plan, okay? But it's too hard to do that when all my negative thoughts come pouring into my brain all the time. Was there no off switch for that?

I'm so distracted that I don't notice Dylan sitting next to me until that moment.

"Hey, Ari," he says, smiling nervously.

"Hi," I say. "What's up with you?"

He shrugs but he still looks uncomfortable.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, it's... nothing. You look nice today. I mean, you do every day but... you get what I mean."

I groan. Shit. Was he being nervous because of how I look now? Well, I attracted a guy... just the wrong one.

I sit in silence with him and eat, filling up my empty stomach. I just hope Danielle's right.

*Ethan's POV*

I can't take my eyes off Ariana. She's changed so much and it's just so... sudden. But I can't get distracted at all. I just can't. I've done this a lot-trying to destroy people's lives. It's pretty fun... but having that person show up the next day looking all sexy and unaffected by the fact that half the school was picking on them... that has never happened.

"Why are you staring at her?" Nina demands. "Stop that."

"I'm not staring," I lie. "She just looks really different."

"You'd think two weeks would be enough to get used to it by now," she notes.

"Nina, how about you do us all a favor and shut the fuck up?" I snap.

She blinks then falls silent.

I don't like Ariana nor am I in love with her. I almost vomit at the mere thought of that. I've pretty much been incapable of any type of positive feeling ever since my family's situation and... well, you know.

It's only her looks that attract me honestly. She's just another name in the list of girls I wanna do. But I can't have her. The only problem is, that makes me want her even more. But to guarantee that I can't and absolutely will not have her, I need to make sure she hates me so much that she won't come within fifty feet of me. I try to pick on her as much as I can and make everyone do the same, but she obviously seems unaffected by all this. I think it's time we try something new.

"Hey, blabbermouth," I say. I stifle a laugh as Nina looks at me, responding to her nickname. "There's something I need you to do."