Our Toxic Love

Chapter Fifty Eight

-Ariana's POV-

When I get back home from school, my legs automatically lead me to my bedroom where Ethan's supposed to be. But I frown as I scan my empty room. Where'd Ethan go?

I descend the staircase and look around the livingroom then check the kitchen. He's literally nowhere to be found. I don't know why I feel stupid searching for him like this.

"Ethan?" I call out.

I notice that his washed clothes and phone have mysteriously disappeared too. He must've left.

I blow out a shaky breath and shake my head. I mean, yeah, I shouldn't expect him to stay here all day everyday but he could've at least told me he was leaving.

Shit. Do I sound too clingy?

I collapse on the couch and unzip my bag, taking out my books to study.

I find myself staring blankly at the unappealing words on the pages of my history book for about ten minutes. I mean, I'm reading the sentences but they're coming out of the other end of my head and not quite sticking to my brain. I just can't focus at the moment.

I take out my phone and scroll down my contact list. I stop at the name Ethan and press my lips together as I regard his name.

Do I call him? I just want to check on him cause he's really sick and I have no idea where he is.

No. I put the phone down. I don't want to call first. I don't know why but it's just a common feminine instinct. I'll just wait for him to call first. I'd probably sound needy if I call now. I don't want him to think I want to be around him every single second of the day -- he'd feel like he's suffocating.

Oh God, I'm so overthinking this. All I want to do is check on him.

I pick the phone back up and pause. But, really, should I call him?

I jolt as I hear the door knock. I rush to it quickly and open it. It's not Ethan. It's Dylan.

It feels like ages since I last saw him though I come across him every day during lunch and some classes. He looks slightly different now though. He's a little taller and less... scrawny.

My heart contracts as I remember the how close we were. Ever since I met Danielle, I just suddenly dropped the guy like he was nothing. God, I'm so stupid. I feel so guilty.

"Ariana?" Dylan says, breaking into my thoughts. His voice isn't so shy and weak anymore. I feel like puberty hit him all over again though he's already seventeen.

"Huh? Oh!" I say quickly, snapping out of my daze. "Dylan, hi!" Okay, I sound way too enthusiastic. Dial it down, Ari.

He smiles. "Hey."

"What are you doing here?" I question.

He shrugs. "I was actually just passing by your house and I wanted to give it a little visit, you know?"

"Sure, come in," I say, gesturing for him to enter.

He walks in and takes a look around as he heads to the couch.

"It's been a long time since I came here," he says. "A few months I think."

"Yeah."

"How's Nathan?"

My face falls. "We're over now."

He blushes. "Right. Sorry. Didn't know that."

"It's fine," I grin. "Dylan... I -- uhm..." I hesitate. I don't want this to get awkward but I feel too guilty about this. "I'm sorry I didn't really... like, talk to you anymore and-"