𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐟𝐭 | carlisle cullen (2)

(𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫) vampires go into shock

✧✧✧

ESTE WAS READING A VERY LARGE BOOK when Carlisle walked into the study. She snapped it shut immediately and placed it on her lap, under the desk. He'd been out hunting with Emmett and Alice, she hadn't heard them come back but then as usual, her mind had been elsewhere.

Bella and Edward had been gone for nearly a month now. They'd been receiving calls every few days with a glowing report from Bella and a few words from Edward that didn't give much away. Bella seemed to have warmed to Este as she'd specifically asked to speak to her, thanking her over and over for allowing her on the mothers island. Este was glad at this turn of events but then again sun and holiday emotions always made people feel more optimistic.

Carlisle looked in confusion at Este as he walked into the room. She smiled as though nothing had happened, staring at Carlisle expectantly.

"What are you reading?" he asked with a small frown.

"Nothing" Este shrugged, "how was hunting? Have Edward and Bella called yet?"

"Hunting was good thank you and no they haven't called" Carlisle was still staring at her in a questioning manner, "you're holding a book"

"Hmmm?" Este stared at him wondering how fast she could put the book back on the shelf.

"Stella?"

"It's stupid" she muttered, "but I mean... it was in your study... I mean you are a doctor so that's not entirely weird a thought but I just saw it, I was barely reading it really and"

Carlisle raised his eyebrows slightly at her rambled words. Este sighed, lifting the book off her lap and placing it on the desk in front of her. It was a book for humans or for doctors in Carlisle's case even if he didn't dabble in psychological care or therapy but it was a book on anxiety. 'How to rid the mind of anxiety'. It was stupid because Este did not have the mind of a human and she already knew that she would never find anything within the pages that could help her.

"I'd just try anything at this point... so" Este murmured under her breath.

Carlisle sighed slightly, obviously sympathetic. He walked towards her, kissing her head before he crouched down so she could stare at him easily. He left his hand on the side of her chair, the other on top of her touch that was rested on the large book.

"Stella I love you" he stated easily, "and I wish behind anything that I could find something to help you but that book... it's not going to hold any answers—"

"I know" Este cut across him, "I know I just wanted to see... I mean you don't know that, humans have anxiety and you said it yourself that the mind remains the most untouched part of becoming like us—"

"And initially I did believe that this could be something passed along from human traits. After all, large parts of ourselves are strengthened through transformation and a lot of human cases are extreme but—"

"But what?"

"You're not human" Carlisle replied simply.

"So what is this then?" Este yelled, her voice strained with the force in which the words came out and the meaning behind the plea.

"I don't know Stella, I don't know" Carlisle tightened his grip on her hands, "I wish I knew Stella, I wish I did but I don't"

"Carlisle be honest" Este stared at him, "do you think this is going to go away?"

"Stella I don't know" Carlisle's words sounded broken, "I've never heard of anything like this before and trust me I've been reading everything I can, trying desperately to find something that might help us but I can't, I can't"