Young Royals: After season 1

Chapter seventy two: Felice

I sat in the armchair next to Eline's hospital bed without leaving her side once. I could not understand what was happening. When I finally had found love, there was a threat to take her away from me. Eline was my sweetheart. I had never loved someone like I loved her. If something were to happen to her, I did not know what I would do. At that moment we only knew it was cancer. We did not know how dangerous it could be. Not if she could live with it for years and eventually be healthy again or if she would be taken away from me in the near future. I felt so powerless. I could do nothing. Nothing to help her. I could only be there for her. Hold her hand.

"You are the love of my life, Felice. You know that right?" Eline said. "I am so happy I made friends with Simon and went to that party and met you." I took her hand in mine. I was so happy I had told her how I felt about her. It would have been my biggest mistake in life if I did not. Even if loving someone could hurt so bad, it was worth it. Living a life scared of love and getting hurt was not a life at all. The risk of being hurt was the price for love. And I would pay it every day just to get to be with Eline. She was my everything.

"Me too. What a sad world it would be if we never crossed paths, my darling," I said. She took my hand in hers. "I love you so much." I could not say that without tearing up. I was so scared of what the future might bring. I was scared I would not have said everything I wanted to her, if it would end badly. I was scared of regretting that I did not tell her I loved her enough. That I did not hold her when I could. And I was so extremely angry. Why had this happened to her? Why her?

"Why are you crying, baby?" she asked.

"Because I am scared," I said. "I can't lose you. Not now. We were supposed to live a long life together. Maybe get married. Have kids. Be happy." Eline kissed my temple.

"Having kids with Wille and Simon?" she teased. We both laughed at the memory. One New year's eve when we had been speaking about the future the question about kids had come up, and I had proposed that we would help each other out.

"Well who knows? Rather than having some random person's DNA in our child, we know Wilhelm and Simon. And we can track Wille's family history down to like the 1500's," I said, a bit jokingly.

"You are a bit crazy, you know that right?" Eline said laughing. I nodded and kissed her.

"I know I am a bit crazy. And I am crazy about you to say the least," I replied.

"You don't know what will happen yet. We might still be able to live that life," she said. "And if there is less time we will just have to hurry things up a bit." Her hand caressed my cheek.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked.

"Well I am not going to die without marrying you first, silly," Eline said. My brain was going crazy with all kinds of thoughts and emotions at the same time. I could not really understand what she was saying to me. But I thought I did.

"Eline Amelia Carlsson, are you proposing to me?" I asked.

"Kind of. Maybe," she said giggling.

"Well you did. And the answer is yes. I want to marry you," I replied. I kissed her. Her lips tasted sweet from the candy Simon and Wilhelm had bought us. She was so insanely beautiful.

"But I will have to get you a ring later because I am too tired now," she said. She closed her eyes and fell asleep. I held her hand. Observed her from my chair. And then I fell asleep too. Exhausted from the days in hospital that would be even more days in hospital.

**********

Simon, Wilhelm, Sara and Marcus came by the hospital daily. Eline's parents were staying with Simon and Wilhelm to be closer to her. When Simon and Wille arrived at the hospital one day, Eline was still sleeping. Simon sat by her side while I changed clothes and had a moment to myself for the first time in days. I sat down in the corridor with Wille, drinking some coffee.

"How is she doing?" Wilhelm asked. I shook my head.

"The prognosis could be worse. But the doctors have given her maybe three years to live," I replied. "She has one more week of treatments she does here at the hospital. And then she will be free to go home for a while until she has more treatments." I saw tears in Wille's eyes.

"I am so sorry, Felice," Wilhelm said. He gave me a hug. "Is there anything Simon and I can do for the two of you?" I had not told anyone but Eline's parents and my own parents that she had proposed to me yet. Eline needed to be close to her parents now. She needed to be close to her friends. Me. She needed me. Her place was too small for all the equipment she would need. She had lost her balance and could not walk at the minute. The medications were strong and had really nasty effects.

"Well there are kind of two things," I said.

"Eline won't be able to move back home. The place is too small and she won't be able to fit a wheelchair in there. And she will have so much stuff for home treatments." Wilhelm nodded.

"Move in with us. We have loads of space. Mrs. and Mr Carlsson already stay at our place, so she will have them close too," he said. I smiled at the offer. "What was this other thing?" I suddenly felt nervous. I was about to tell one of my best friends that I was engaged. To my terminally ill girlfriend.

"This is kind of a secret at the moment. You are the first person I am telling this except for her and my parents," I said. He was curious. I could tell by his eyes.

"What?" he asked.

"We kind of got engaged a few days ago," I said. Wilhelm smiled big.

"Really?" he asked. I nodded and smiled at him. "Congratulations." He embraced me in another hug. He laughed happily.

"And I want to give her the wedding of her dreams," I said. "Would you and Simon want to help me make it happen?" He nodded.

"Of course we will, Felice," he said. I smiled. "And we will have to get you guys engagement rings I see." He noticed my hands were naked. There was no ring. It was not a top priority right now. We went back inside Eline's room. Simon was still sitting by her side, holding her hand. She was awake now. But that was barely.

"You guys look happy. What mischief have you two been up to?" Eline asked.

"I have told Wille our little secret. I am sorry baby. I had to," I replied. She laughed.

"What secret?" Simon asked. Eline looked at him with a smile. She pointed to his wedding ring. She sometimes lost words and pointed instead.

"What? Are you engaged?" he said. We both nodded. "I am so happy for you. Congratulations." He hugged Eline gently. And then he hugged me.

"And we are becoming roommates too," Wilhelm said. "We have decided that Eline and Felice will live with us so that Eline has her parents closer and so she does not have to bother with fitting everything into her little apartment. If that is something you want of course." He looked at Eline. She nodded.

"I love you guys," Eline said. I smiled when she did.