Ch 36: I Don't Wanna Live Forever

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"I just wanna keep calling your name, until you come back home"

"Always remember, a fairies magic solely relies on their emotions" my mother said. "If you cannot control your emotions then-"

"I cannot control my magic. Yes I know, mum" I said.

She smiled as I created a small ball of fire in my palm.

"Am I the best Fire Fairy yet?" I asked with a smile.

"You'll do wondrous things when you grow up, my darling" she said. "I just know it."

My body felt normal as I felt a hand on my cheek. I opened my eyes to see my mother right in front of me.

"Mum?" I said.

"Hello, my darling" she said.

Tears began streaming down my face as I threw my arms around her.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry" I cried.

"Shhh" she said. "It's all right."

A couple minutes after me holding her, we left to a small cottage before we were to be found. I couldn't tear my eyes away from my mother, astonished she was here but grateful she was.

"I can't believe this" I said.

"We couldn't believe it either. It's all thanks to Flora" Terra said.

"I couldn't figure out why the compound wasn't working at the graveyard" Flora said. "And then I saw my plants wilting, and it all clicked. This little guy was absorbing every piece of life essence he could. In the First World, they're called resurrection plants."

"We fed it the last bit of Dragon Flame from the convergence crystal, and it opened up" Aisha said.

"You were in there?" I asked.

"My spirit was, yes" my mother said.

"That's like super weird, right?" Gwen said.

"When I realized what Rosalind was going to do, I drew on as much magic as I could and called on the natural world to preserve me" she said. "I owed you all one last goodbye. Especially you, Briar. Life is precious, but so is death. Both must be respected."

I was dreading hearing the words she was about to say.

"I did not survive Rosalind's attack" she said. "So, I can't help you fight the battle ahead. But I do have time for one more lesson."

"Magic lessons really aren't my thing anymore. So maybe I should go and guard the door" Musa said.

"You're all fairies, this lesson is for all of you" she said. "It's about transformation magic. When I was your headmistress, I shielded you from the harsh truths of the world. I believed that positive emotions were the cornerstone of powerful magic. Rosalind felt the opposite. That strength was only forged in those harsh truths. We were both wrong."

Bloom and I looked at each other as she smiled.

"To unlock true magic, you must make peace with all your emotions" she said. "The reckless joy of the positive and the despair of the negative. There is beauty and power in both. I'm so proud of each of you. And of the women you're becoming."

My eyes were focused on my mother as she turned to me.

"Shall we take a walk?" She said.

I nodded, following her outside. We sat outside on an old bench, staring at the school grounds.

"Are you disappointed in me?" I asked. "For losing control? For.. killing somebody."

"Taking a life is serious, Briar. I'm afraid you'll carry that burden forever" she said. "When we discovered what Rosalind had done at Aster Dell, I was so angry I.. I wanted to kill her. If I had the power you have, things may have turned out differently."

"She made your death sound so casual.. like it meant nothing.. I couldn't take it" I said.

"The world is a better place without Rosalind Hale" she said. "That's the objective truth. What's done is done. You cannot alter the past."

"But it's not done because I still have this thing inside me" I said. "I wish you would've told me. Instead making everything a big secret."

"I suppose that is one of my few regrets in life" she said.

"What am I?" I asked. "Rosalind never answered the question. From the beginning I was able to control two elements. Then when I transformed I was able to use all. I don't blame you for hiding some of it from me but.."

"You are what's called an Elemental Fairy. They were supposed to be a myth but legends said one day one would be born and along with it the birth of Elemental Fairies" she said. "Any offspring you have will always have your magic. They too will be Elemental Fairies and the cycle will continue until there is no more offspring. And that is when Elemental Fairies will die."

I let out a long breath, finally hearing the truth of what I am. I felt a presence behind us as I looked at my hands.

"The Dragon Flame inside me doesn't scare me, but I know it scares Bloom" I said.

I turned around as Bloom slowly approached us. I wanted to spend as much time with my mother as I could but I would be selfish to take up all the time she had left. I stood up, letting Bloom take my spot as I rubbed my hand on her arm, walking past her.

I leaned against the side of the cottage as Bloom and my mother talked for a bit. I watched as they embraced one another. Once they pulled apart, my mother looked at me. I slowly walked towards them as she held her hands up. I walked directly into them as the tears came out of nowhere.

"It's almost time" she said.

"I don't want to say goodbye" I cried.

"I love you, Briar" she whispered.

"Please.. don't make me say goodbye. Mum, please don't go. I don't want you to go" I whispered.

I closed my eyes as her body slipped from my grasp. I didn't want to opened my eyes because if I did, she would be gone forever. I felt Bloom put her hand on my shoulder as I slowly opened my eyes. I wiped my tears as she wrapped her arms around me.

"Thank you" I whispered.

We pulled apart as I looked at everyone. I realized Gwen, Flora and Musa were gone.

"I wanted to thank all of you, for everything" I said. "Stell, you didn't have to defend me to your mum and Aisha you didn't either."

I walked towards Terra, pulling her into a hug.

"Oh, well this is nice" she said.

"Thank you for letting me see my mum one last time" I said. "For helping at least."

I sighed, letting her go. I looked at Millie as she smiled.

"Thanks for being my best friend" I said.

"I wouldn't want to do this with anyone else" she said. "You know that."

I held back more tears, nodding. When I first heard that my mother was murdered I felt my whole world crash down. Mainly because my last moments with her were filled with hatred. Now that I got to say goodbye, a piece of me was healed. But I would never be able to fill the void in my heart that she left. And that was the honest truth.

Farah Dowling would forever and always be my mother. Nothing would ever change that.

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