Chaos

Quiet Partner

"Should you have spoken to him?" Lucille called out.
"He's a mind reader and a psychometrist. Steer away from that one, and don't let him touch you."
I flipped through the pages of the mundane magazines left in the lounge to pass the time. The ladies had already fastened boots to my feet and were now attending to Lucille's change in outfit. The changing area was separated with a curtain sectioning off a corner of the room where they placed a platform for dressing.

"You know, Mr Cecas came to ask me for you. You guys got to speak to each other?"

She must be speaking about Howard. "Yes, I did."

"Stephen, too, right? How are... things between the both of you?"

"Fine," I answered bleakly.

Is that a lie? She huffed.

Let's discuss this later, my love- when we don't have company. If I am still well and the Doctor has decided on my diagnosis, all will be known then.

I had a habit of lying unintentionally about how I was feeling. I don't think that's something I can stop doing suddenly. If it were only 20 years of convincing myself I was okay, then it's something I can consciously avoid; however, I've got 200 years of negative tendencies to unpack if I'm to start being more honest. If it's only Lucille... I would not mind being more honest if it were just in her company.

Chaos, how long will you make me wait? Just keep me in the loop. Your illness isn't some big reveal, it-

Okay... okay, I hear you. Just... wait until the morning. I will tell you what I know.
Even now, I dreaded having to divulge my past, but... I suppose Lucille has a right to know. I leaned forward, and threaded my fingers into my hair, my elbows planted onto my thighs. 

I wonder if I'll embarrass myself in front of her if she thinks or treats me differently. I think what I fear most is what she'll think of me, which is a first for me. If it is what Lucille thinks, it must be true- that philosophy has been etched into my mind. The people who say they care about me: Azrail, Judith and Lucille- if they, who are not typically swayed by my morbid nature, can come to think of me differently, then... 

"Chaos? What do you think?" The curtains were pulled apart, allowing Lucille to emerge in her new attire. She wore a short teal dress that flared toward the hem, with sheer material dressing the bust. The sheer aspect of the neckline and shoulders seamlessly blended into the solid fabric toward the end, with jewels and meticulous embroidery accentuating the curve of her bosom in what I recall as a 'sweetheart' neckline.

This was the second most expensive dress.
I stood up and kissed her hand again to replace the red mark they had removed from her skin.

"You little devil. It's too late. I've assimilated into this posh lifestyle already. You can't fluster me anymore." Lucille sucked in her cheeks and looked down at me from her high brow.
"Posh?" I smiled. It would be difficult for her to look down on me if we're about the same height when she's in heels.

"Yes, come now. We must be on our way." she urged in a British accent. I'm not British, but I can understand where she comes from; the hierarchy was based on British aristocracy.

"Lucille. On a more serious note-"
"Oh geez, is there going to be human sacrifice tonight or something?"

"That was already cancelled. But if things get too gory in there for you, cover your eyes and ears, I will have Judith escort you out, and you can wait with Yuik in the ballroom."

"Yuik? Won't Elijah be there? Also, what was cancelled?" Her eyes blew wide and searched my face for answers or to see if I were joking. I was only humouring her jest, but it was true that we planned a human sacrifice. Lucille is naturally intuitive and clever; she made a guess, but it turned out to be true.