Phakade Lami (My Forever)

Chapter 45

When Gog’Thembeka was buried in this place, it looked so beautiful and despite the fact that it wasn’t fully ‘renovated’ but they was that thing that screamed ‘Her Time Had Come' and that’s why the earth/soil accepted her body and soul quickly, without hesitation.

BUT TODAY, that same ground has dried up and in all honesty, everything has ‘dried up’... the place may have been renovated, during the many renovations but still it looks gone, like they is no longer spirits that dwell there.
Buhle and Angelina will be buried next to Gog’Thembeka, since she was the last one to die, in this family and that was many years ago.

Everyone is seated under that big black tent that has over 30 chairs under it, and most of it, is family.
I always remember how this family started with only Hector, four dimpled brothers and two dimpled sons.
Today that family stands with so many members, and their all dressed in black, well except for Harriet and her father, who are dressed in white.
Imagine “pure” white to a funeral, in a dusty place.
Nka loma wedding dress.
But I guess nobody wants to entertain her and her countless drama, from shaka-land.

Hector and Zimele, are seated next to each other but separate in terms of feelings and emotions.
They look so distance, and as for Nganono, I doubt that he will ever recover from this.
I remember how he seat on that floor and looked at the body of his wife, with tears streaming down.
I hated it, I hated the fact that he had to shelter himself, away from everyone.
He wanted to cry but too who, he doesn’t have a mother or father, and the only people that he could shed his tears for, are both dead in terms of spirit and flesh.
His wife and Hector.

I am not going to cry again, those were the words that I said, when Hector buried his father and, his younger brother and now his daughter.
Will he survive this, that’s my question because as they call people to come, he looks like he is in another planet.
He first pours soil on Angelina’s coffin and slowly but surely, those words that she said to him, when she came to his house, flow back to his head.
“I know I made a mistake and my entire life has all, been about making ‘mistakes’ and they seem to follow each other, you know... just look, first it was Nganono, then the baby that made me force the marriage and then the marriage itself... I can’t believe that I have been married to him for over 4 years and still no child” she said.
Hector tries to hold the tears, as she passes Angelina’s father and I tell you that man is a razor blade, he is so angry and upset at everyone.
I remember the day, that they went to pay her lobola, he practically shouted at her, in front of them, when she agreed to marry him.
He said, “If you marry this family, the only thing that will make me see you again, it’s gonna be your funeral... when you sleep with guns, you wake up in a bloodbath,” and he was right.
He came to bury his own daughter, that’s the thing that brought them back.

Hector is standing in front of his daughter’s burial spot and I can tell you for sure, that it’s about to go down.
He can’t stand on his feet, despite the fact that Zimele is holding him, as he looks at those tiny eyes that he carries.
He sees that same face that kneeled down and consoled him, on the day that he got the news of his father’s death.
He looks at Buhle’s coffin and immediately he falls to the ground, and screams out loud.
You should see MmeMoichela and Hector’s siblings, it’s as if something has been taken away from them.
He takes the soil and wipes it, on his face screaming Buhle’s name.

Hector may have never given birth to Buhle but that bond and love, that they shared, is one of the reasons, why he is crying like this.
Harriet watches from away and slowly, she wipes that one tear that escapes her left eye.
She looks at Zithulele, and he is perfectly squeezed into Prince’s  embrace and one can see the sadness on his face.
I still remember, the day... that specific day, when he entered Hector’s room and seat on his laps.
It was scary but you should have seen his face, he was scared and practically horrified by what had taken place, by what was beyond his control.