Can I Steal Your Heart? - A LawLu fanfic

(Luffy) Chapter 63 - Insecurities

Law backed away when Luffy went for a kiss. It wasn't the first sign that something was wrong, now that Luffy thought about it, but it was the one that got his attention.

"Torao? What's wrong?"

He hadn't said hardly ten words since he'd made sure Luffy was completely out of his nightmare. Luffy thought he'd just had trouble shaking off his own, but he saw now that it went deeper than that. Something had shaken Law's confidence. Something in Law had broken.

Law looked at him, those familiar gray-green eyes wet and sad, as he wordlessly Roomed them into his quarters. Then, with a shaky breath, Law let out five devastating words: "This has been a mistake."

If Luffy hadn't had a clue what those words meant, from the tone and the posture and the heartache Law exuded, Law made it more obvious by removing the silver ring — the ring Luffy had given him — from his finger and pushing it gently into Luffy's palm.

Luffy looked at the ring, then back up at Law, trying not to panic. "... Do you not love me anymore?"

"You know that's not it," Law answered, his voice cracking with emotion.

"Then why? Why are you scared now?"

Law hesitated in his answer, and Luffy could practically see him fighting himself. But finally the words came, strangled and pained. "I couldn't protect you."

"In your nightmare? It was a dream, Law, it wasn't real. I'm okay!"

"Before the nightmare. During the nightmare. I should've been able to prevent either of us being hit, especially you. And then we were both down and Zoro had to finish the fight. What if the enemy had been too much for him alone? We could've both lost... everything." Law shook his head, pulling back another step to slump into one of the chairs at his small table. "If I go so catatonic from the illusion of losing you that I can't help our crew after a fight, I don't... I don't deserve you. Or co-captaincy, or any of it."

Luffy felt his face set into stubbornness as he pushed the ring back into Law's hand. "No. You're being stupid again, Torao." He wrapped those long tattooed fingers around the ring, trying to force Law to take it back.

"Luffy..."

"NO. You're mine. I know you're scared because of what happened earlier, but I'm not gonna let you run away from me!" Seeing the other's shoulders slump impossibly further made Luffy want to cry and hold him and yell all at the same time. "I shoulda been able to stop it or dodge it, too, so it's stupid to blame yourself for that! And yeah, my nightmare had me losing you, too, and I didn't like it, but it was just a nightmare! Zoro's strong. All of our crew is strong! And we got through it, didn't we?"

"Yes, and what about the next time? And the time after that?" Law didn't look at him. He just stared down into his loose hand, looking at the ring there. "What about the day one of us actually loses the other, and our crew has to fight alone because whoever's left is too broken to help properly?"

"... That could still happen whether we're together or not, Torao. Pirates don't live long lives, remember? Will it be any easier to lose me if I'm halfway around the world when it happens? I'd rather have every minute with you, even your last. Don't you want that, too?"

Law didn't answer, just set the ring down on the table with an audible clink.

"Isn't that why you wanted to get married?" Luffy tried again, now actively fighting back tears. Was this it? Was Law really going to give up on him like this, after all those promises and memories and... everything? Just because of a nightmare?

He turned to the door, unable to bear the heavy silence from the man he'd intended to marry.

"... if you aren't wearing it tomorrow, I'll... I'll know what it means, okay?" It took all his willpower to say those words, and yet somehow he managed to open the door.