Emperor of Mayhem

77 [part one]

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WEAPON OF WAR
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(according to the result from the question I posted on the last chapter, this was supposed to be MIKHAIL'S POV. but due to most of the comments from that same last chapter, i had to write this chapter first before the one I planned to write in Mikhail's point of view. The full information will be at the end of the second part of this chapter)

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The people of the man I loved didn't want me, not for any reason whatsoever. And they had decided to pull many strings just to let me know that my only weapon was my love and devotion to Mikhail. And for them, that wasn't enough.

I was a weak link and they always cut off weak links. So in other words, I should disappear and not hang around to prove a stupid, lame point. 

I remembered how I swallowed all pride and went to them, against Mikhail's will. Well technically, I requested a meeting with the elders on my own accord, while Mikhail was away searching for allies in a desperate attempt to acquire more power, the power his family so desperately hungered for. 

I couldn't just sit and do nothing while he was trying so hard to not let go of me. I wanted to speak with them one on one. I guess I thought my words could be convincing enough to strike a deal. 

But they wanted wealth, power and prestige, and they would get that simply by marrying off their Pakhan to a powerful Greek princess. That was easy, anyone would snatch that opportunity. Why lag and put hopes on a nine-teen-year-old girl in a high school uniform, right? What was the most crazy thing she could ever do? Slash the Principal's car? Put graffiti on the school wall or what? Mow the police's car?

For the elders, I could never be the weapon of war for the clan. Being with me was only going to make Mikhail weaker. And weakness was a bitter gourd in their tongue.

I remembered the way they looked at me when I walked into their boardroom to tell them the union with the Greek princess should be reconsidered. They had looked at me like I wasn't even worth a spec of dust.

I remembered how their demeaning laughter rang viciously through the enclosed air, the travesty and disregard in their eyes. They looked at me like how you would look at a garbage bin. It made my inside boil like a hot larva, it seared through my heart like a dagger.

It tore my soul apart. 

And right now, thinking about all I had been doing for the past weeks; building my physical strength by engaging in every martial art that existed, just to become at least a shadow of what they desired, made me feel pathetic.

Growing up and learning about the good and the bad, I never thought to the point of needing to take self defense classes. I never imagined myself using a knife if it wasn't for cutting vegetables. 

I wanted a simple life, a simple love in a simple man. But what was I to do when life offered me the cruelest kind of man with the hardest kind of love? How would I fight it when there seemed to be an invisible string pulling me to his darkness? A string that wouldn't cut loose no matter how hard I teetered, only getting stronger?