Emperor of Mayhem

96

A/N; writing this chapter was something else. I have never felt so much difficulty writing a chapter before. Hence, I don't feel satisfied with the end product of this. I didn't want to publish it, but for how long will I continue to try and fix one thing or the other? I decided to publish because it was long overdue. Might be boring, but just pay attention and digest details so you can at least understand a few things cause honestly, this chapter is just a mess in my opinion. But be a better judge of that.

Thanks for understanding <3

BLOOD FOR BLOOD
__________________

The following day after Riccardo pointed out that I was pregnant, I blacked out in the middle of the kitchen while preparing breakfast for the son of the prison warden I kidnapped. I woke up later that morning with a doctor hovering over my face.

What happened?' I had asked in a week, feeling the unmissable change in my body all too suddenly.

"You passed out," Riccardo, who was standing by the bed all along, broke the news to me. And I was confused, bothered even. I wasn't sick. I didn't feel any pain. Why then did I pass out?

Riccardo did the honor of placing a test result before me.

"You're are sixteen weeks pregnant," the doctor had broken the news before I could fully understand what was written on the paper.

In that instant, air was knocked completely out of my system for a few seconds as I struggled with the truth.

I was pregnant. How? I was going to ask out loud before I realized how stupid that question would have sounded even to me. How would I not be pregnant when I kept having sex without protection knowing well that I wasn't exactly religiously taking the pregnancy pills that would have prevented such? I hated drugs, whatever form they came in, be it a Vitamin C which you could even find in the form of gummy bears. I wouldn't take the pills because they looked like drugs. And I would usually just hum in reply whenever Mikhail asked if I still took them.

So the how was never voiced out. I just sat there on the bed with my head buried in my palms as thoughts ran through my head. Then I laid my hand on my stomach which never felt different before but all of a sudden, I could almost feel it, as if there was a heartbeat.

Not seeing my period for three months should have been a big hint. But I had just assumed it was my hormonal imbalance acting up again. Missing periods was never new thing to me. It happened all the time, especially when I was going through depression after Mom's death.

Anyway, It was a mixed feeling to find out I was going to bring a child into the world. I was sad yet I was happy. I didn't know which to hold on to the most. But I definitely didn't want to be sad. Neither was I able to fully be happy. Then I thought if Mikhail was with me, he would have held me, he would have said one of those things he always said in times like this and made me feel better. I was just told I was carrying a child and I didn't have my husband there with me.

The battle between being happy or sad was overtaken by an unknown one; rage.

It spread through me with the lethality of poison. It shackled my bones and twisted my gut like wrought iron. I wanted to destroy, to wrap my fingers around the necks of those who took Mikhail away from me and squeeze every last breath out of them. I wanted to set their empire on fire and watch it burn until there was nothing left of them but ashes and bones.