Broken Trust | Jikook

34

Authors POV

"Ms. Kang, cancel the rest of my meetings for the day," said Jungkook with a sigh as he gulped almost an entire bottle of water.

"Yes, sir, anything else you'll be needing?" asked the secretary politely.

"That would be all, thank you." Ms. Kang politely bowed before exiting Jungkook's office.

Jungkook POV

"What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I so short of breath?" I curse, rubbing my chest, where I can feel an intense, dull ache.

If Jimin were here, he would've dragged me by the ear to the doctor. I chuckle as I remember sometimes pretending to be sick just so that he would look after me.

The last few years have been tough for me. I always drown myself in work and end the night with alcohol. Sometimes I'd sleep in my office, but because I have Bam now, I try to go home every day.

I don't like being at home because that's when I feel most lonely.

Even though my house is beautifully decorated to imitate a lived-in, homey feel, it still doesn't feel like home. For instance, when I cook and set out an entire table of dishes and there's nobody to eat with,

I miss my husband so much. I miss our silly late-night talks and playful banter. I miss the times when we'd take walks in the park or go on spontaneous road trips. I miss waking up to his beautiful, puffy face squished up against my chest in deep sleep.

I miss him wholeheartedly. The day he left, I vowed to never touch or look in another's direction again, and I've stayed true to that promise. I'll do whatever it takes to get my love back.

I have this little glimmer of hope in my heart that one of these days he will show up here and run into my arms. I will never let him go again, and I will never make such a stupid mistake again.

For quite some time, I've been writing to Jimin as much as I can and then beg his mother to give it to him wherever he is in the world, but I haven't for a while now; I've been very busy and constantly traveling and never had the chance to sit down and pour my heart out to him.

I've also recently not been feeling well. My body just doesn't feel right. I'm always short of breath and experiencing body pain to the point where it's getting concerning. Pain medication doesn't work anymore, and the only time I don't feel the pain in my body and heart is when I have excessive amounts of alcohol. I'm aware that it's not healthy and might be the cause of my discomfort, but what else do I do when I just want to be numb?

As I was gathering my belongings to head home, there was a knock at the door.

"Come inside!" I exclaimed.

The door opens, and Namjoon enters with a lunch bag in hand.

"Hey, have you eaten yet? I hope not because I have a delivery from Jin and he'll kill me if I return with this food." said Namjoon placing the bag on my desk.

"I haven't, actually, but I'm not hungry. The pain in my back is killing me," I replied with a nervous chuckle.

"Kook, don't you think you should get that checked out? You've been complaining about this for almost a year now," says Namjoon as he unpacks the dishes on the coffee table.

"I am; that's why I cancelled all my meetings and am heading over there. I need something strong prescribed for this pain." I grunted as I got up and made my way over to the couch.