His Worth | MxM

² five

"How were my notes?"

I stood before Claire as he looked at me curiously, holding his notes that I read over completely. I could tell he was hoping for something good. He definitely was going to hear something good from me, but...I've just been distracted mentally.

"They were amazing. I appreciated them a lot." I tell him truthfully, except he didn't seem to believe me. "Promise."

"I know...that you have your case coming up soon," Claire starts, my eyes narrowing upon him, "so I get it if you couldn't really read over my notes thoroughly."

"It's...it's not even like that." I make known immediately.

He didn't seem so sure of my words, but he didn't pry for more. He just nods in understanding and I didn't see the reason for me to...disclose my whole situation to him. I'm so out of it that I don't even know where to begin.

How can I...even concentrate today?

"I bet," Claire starts, my eyes moving back onto his, "your professors will be understanding of you moving your classes online even sooner. That's very big now, going to school online - even in University. No one would judge you...especially with everything that is about to come your way."

"That trial is the least of my worries right now, honestly," I make that known once again, "I have...other things in my life to worry about. I'm just not making any right decisions, ever. I'm always doing something wrong for somebody, I can never win either way."

As I say that, I saw Claire look at me with concern. He can...take that as he wants, because that's all I'll give.

I'm stressed out, I'm disappointed in myself, and I know Nate is still upset with me. I can't seem to win with anybody.

The only time I was truly winning was when I was in that damn prison. When everyone catered themselves to me and I had that power...despite how I got it and what it took for me to get it.

"You seem very different to the Worth I used to see around here."

"Because I'm now stressed out and people tried something on me once again at that party. Under what circumstances would I still be the way I once was? Of course I'm different! Then I have this trial coming up and that really is putting me back, not to mention my older brother-!" I stop, my eyes closing tightly as I shake my head. "Nate is mad at me too. I can't rest in the solace that when I go home, everything will be fine. Because no matter what I do, I'm somehow doing something wrong. No one will ever be able to understand, no one!"

I look at my phone to see the time, already deciding that...I don't think I can go to class today. Online probably is the best solution for many reasons.

I wasn't planning on going online this soon, but I really don't think I have much of a choice.

"You might need a counselor Worth."

Flinching, I look at Claire like he's crazy. He grinned at me awkwardly as he put his notebook into his bag, quickly facing me again.

"I don't need...a counselor."

"A psychologist, I should've said. You aren't doing so well and I think you're going to have a mental breakdown soon-."

"You're assuming that off of the little of stuff I've given you?" I question him mockingly, beginning to become frustrated.

"Not at all. Who wouldn't be- excuse my language - fucked up after everything you've been through? You're been through shit and seem to be still dealing with shit. Not that I'm saying your partner is the cause of that, but it seems mentally? You're...stuck."