61. cursed to hold a weight you can't bare

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THE HEAVY WEIGHT OF A GOLD BAND sat on the scarred flesh of Clara Shelby's thumb. It had been too big for any of her other fingers. It was not made for her, nor was it even truly hers at all. Her glazed eyes traced the smooth metal, only slightly worn down from its constant use. There were scratches, faint but evident to those who examined it thoroughly (—as she had done as soon as it had been given to her). It was just a plain band of gold, with no extra flourish or intricate details, yet it was quick to become Clara's most prized possession.

John's gold ring was heavy on her hand.

It had been a staple in his wardrobe from when he had turned eighteen and Polly had gifted it to him. He had worn it every day, he'd even taken it to France and pinned it on the inside of his uniform. She remembered being younger and playing with his ringed hand as he'd walked her to school. She remembered irritated him relentlessly about why he always wore it, claiming it wasn't that great of an object.

"It's boring!" Nine-year-old Clara had complained. She wasn't much of an extravagant child but they'd walked past the most luxurious of jewellers in Small Heath— a jewellers which upon reflection wasn't all that fancy but to the little girl it was a place of riches and fortune. "It's boring and plain!"

"So are you," John had deadpanned before he glanced down to look at the scowling girl with a cheeky grin. Clara had begun to attack him, her little but powerful fists pounding into his side as he chuckled. "Calm down, weasel!"

Eighteen-year-old John had paused and playfully scooped the girl up over his shoulder so that she was hanging over his back. Clara remembered slapping her hands against his spine in a desperate attempt to wiggle her way free.

"'s a gift," John had eventually huffed as he carried her, his gait unwavering. "Reminds me of the family, alrigh', that's all." He had sounded embarrassed to admit it as if saying the words aloud would end in teasing.

"You're so weird!"

Clara let a faint smile traipse across her face as she remembered her retort. His words were met with countless jokes and laughter on her half. She understood his words now. The ring was his and reminded her of him, it was all quite simple. The young woman shut her eyes and clenched her jaw tight, her finger still running over the gold of the band.

"Esme..." Clara had whimpered in the loving hold, her startled blue eyes welling with tears. The older woman had pulled away slightly, her thumbs brushing Clara's tears away.

"We can go on the road with the kids," Esme had said almost pleadingly. "You're my sister, maybe not by blood but by soul." The older woman pressed her fingers to Clara's chest. "Come with us,"

Clara had pulled away as her throat tightened. "I can't," she had murmured, completely withdrawing from the warmth of Esme's touch, the warmth that almost overpowered the frost of unrivalled grief that threatened to permeate her heart. "Get them out of here, Es, keep them safe."

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⏰ Last updated: Oct 22, 2023 ⏰

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