10 steps away

Chapter 45

I felt my chest tighten, a pain taking over me that I have never experienced before. In the corner of my eyes I could see Des glaring at Harry and I decided to go to sleep, not wanting to deal with any of this.

"I'm going to bed." I mumbled almost inaudible and I looked at Des who gave me an apologetic look. I glanced at Harry quickly before leaving the kitchen and heading up the stairs to his room.

I felt tears sting my eyes but did not let them fall down my cheeks. I didn't want to cry because of this because what if I'm overreacting? The thing that bothered me the most Is not that he's close with her, it's the fact that he stopped himself form introducing him as his girlfriend. Is he embarrassed about me?

I closed the door behind me as I entered the bedroom and I sat down at the end of the bed, staring into space and letting my brain ask myself the one question that bothers me the most over and over again. Why didn't he just simply tell her that I'm his girlfriend?

I didn't even notice the hot tears falling down my cheeks until I put my face in my hands. I felt pathetic for crying for such a reason and I wiped my tears away angrily. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"You won't cry because of that." I told myself and opened my eyes again.

I didn't even bother getting changed in some pyjamas as I lay down on the bed and just decided to go to sleep. It wasn't that late yet but I just felt like sleeping. I rolled my eyes as the door creaked open.

"Baby?" Harry's voice was quiet and I heard him close the door before taking a few steps towards me. His weight shifted the bed as he sat down but I kept lying on my chest, not looking at him.

"Don't 'baby' me." I grumbled which caused a sigh to escape Harry's mouth.

"What's wrong?" He asked me and I could hear worry in his voice. But that only made me more irritated.

"What's wrong?" I asked, sitting up and finally moving my eyes towards Harry. His eyes were soft and held concern and worry behind them.

"I don't know, maybe it could be the fact that you let a girl basically kiss you when your girlfriend is standing right next to you, or maybe it could be the fact that you just ignore me and don't even have the guts to look at me. Or it could be the fact that you fucking cut yourself off when you were to introduce me as your girlfriend and you just introduce me as 'Brittany'." My voice was raised at the end but I wasn't shouting. This was the first time I cursed in front of Harry but that's the last thing I care about at the moment.

"Listen, I'm sorry-"I cut him off.

"'You're sorry?" I laughed, trying to overplay that I was actually hurt. "If you're embarrassed about me being your girlfriend then you shouldn't have asked me to be your girlfriend in the first place and you definitely should not have asked me to come here with you. You know what's sad? There's always one person who cares more, who loves more and who gives more."

"Don't say that." He shook his head, his eyebrows furrowed together and he cleared his voice. "I love you, only you. And I am incredibly sorry for what has happened downstairs, I'm fucking sorry, okay? I didn't mean to make you feel this way because I never want to hurt you. I was just as surprised as you were when she basically attacked me.

I should've introduced you as my girlfriend to her and yes I know I'm an arsehole for doing so but it's not that easy when you're girlfriend and ex-girlfriend is in the same room and you don't want to hurt either of them."

I felt my eyes sting with tears once again and I blinked to make then disappear, unsuccessfully.

"So if your girlfriend and ex-girlfriend are both in the same room you choose to hurt your girlfriend?" I ask him not so confidently. My voice cracked slightly at the end I felt incredibly embarrassed about being so weak.

"That's not what I meant-"

"But it's what you said." I felt a tear running down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away.

"Fuck, please don't cry." He moved closer to me and waited a few seconds, waiting if I'll flinch away but I didn't. He hesitantly cupped my face with both his hands, his fingers tucking in my hair and his thumbs running softly over my cheeks, wiping away the tears that I didn't know were falling.

"I love you. I love you so fucking much that it physically pains me to be away from you, it hurts me to see you like this and it scares he shit out of me because I've never had those feelings for anyone before. You're the only girl I want to be with and I didn't mean the thing with Chelsea to happen, I totally forget about her to be honest." His piercing green eyes were looking in to mine and I took my lower lip between my teeth.

"I'll tell her that you're my girlfriend right now and I'll tell her to leave us alone. I don't care about her, what I had with her was nothing, really. You need to believe me when I tell you that I love you, only you."

I smiled softly and said, "I love you, too."

A big smile broke out on Harry's face and he leaned down to kiss me. His lips pressed against mine made my heart pound. His hands remained cupping my face and I enjoyed this moment, not wanting it to ever stop. But I don't want any moments with him to stop. I felt really stupid for making such a big deal out of it but all I'm worried about I losing Harry. I couldn't stand not being with him because my heart belongs to him.

He pulled away from the kiss and stood up, offering me his hand which I gladly took, lifting myself from the mattress beneath me. He kissed my temple in a loving way as I stood next to him and entwined our fingers like he usually does.

"I told Chelsea to leave." He informed me as we made our way down the stairs. I nodded my head and found myself smiling.

"Everything okay between you two again?" Harry's dad asked as we entered the kitchen and he was at the same spot he was before. The corner of his lips tugged up into a closed mouth smile as he saw our entwined hands.

"Yeah, it is." Harry answered, his hand leaving mine and wrapping around my waist instead. "You don't need to give me another lecture." There was amusement in his voice and I heard his dad chuckle.

Just as if he can read my mind his head turned towards me, a smile plastered on his face, and he said, "He was bit mad at me for what I did, too."

I smiled softly and nudged his side with my elbows. "It wasn't really a cool thing to do." I said playfully and Harry's eyes seemed to hold regret and guilt.

"I know, I'm sorry. I swear I'll make it up to you."

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I'm really sorry for not updating, I was on a school trip. But anyways, I hope you enjoy the new Chapter :) I don't know why but wattpad isn't letting me write in fat and cursive?

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