Melody of death | English Version | Charles Leclerc FF

forty-four ఌ

„And if they didn't die, then they're still alive today," I yarped when I closed the book full of fairy tales. My eyes sank to the two girls in my arms. They slept calmly, their heads placed on my chest. Fortunately, Charles and I had already made them ready for bed before. Said Monegasque came around the couch with quiet and slow steps and stroked my shoulder as he passed by. I looked up at him with a tired smile. Unable to move. Instead, I preferred to put my heavy head on the backrest of the sofa, which was not comfortable, but easier than holding it up.

„Do you want to spend the whole night here?" Charles asked with a whisper and pointed to the kids with a laugh. I grumbled with a grin and nodded as a lazy answer. My legs felt like jelly and my brain forced me to stay seated because it was spinning circles in my head. You didn't eat anything yet today, Célina. I remembered and sighed annoyed. And I wouldn't do that today either anymore. I wanted to prove to myself that I can stand it for a long time without food. Or I wanted to prove it to him - my uncle - even if he logically wouldn't know about it. After all, I won't call him or text him. Nevertheless. Something in me didn't want to give up now.

„You look broken. I carry the little ones into the children's room," his calm and sensitive voice warmed my freezing heart. I thanked him and watched as he first brought Rose and then June into the children's room two rooms away. I had to fight not to let my eyelids close. I didn't even want to know what dark circles are dragging under my eyes.

When Charles returned, he did not sit down with me as the first stage, but made a detour to the kitchen. I thought I heard the faucet, but then I wasn't sure if it wasn't the blood in my ears that was rustling. But I wasn't mistaken. With a large and full glass of water and a straw in it, he sat down next to me and held it against me waiting. Irritated, I stared at him, undecided what to do. „Drink! You don't look healthy," the same moment his voice ran over his lips, I realized that that was no question. I sighed, took the glass and drank a few sips. The water filled my empty stomach a little, which scared away the stomach growling for the time being.

„Empty!", Charles admonished me and looked at me with a strict look. "I don't want you to pass out. That's what you look like. Did you eat anything today?"

Oh damn.

„Oh, yes sure. At work and after..." I croaked, because my neck was dry like the Sahara. „What did you eat?" now he sounded even more serious than before. „Um", please, my loved mind, work one last time for me and give me ideas, „A bread roll, then later a salad..." I lied, but based on Charles' raised brows and the folded forehead, I realized how little he believed me.
He shook his head, sighed and put a hand on my thigh. My limbs trembled, my stomach turned around five times and my head drove a carousel. Only this little touch, had raised something good in me. A little bit of holy world.
„Célina, you know how much I hate being lied to. Especially you, my girlfriend, should only speak the truth to me. Do you understand that? Otherwise, no relationship that depends on our mutual trust works," although his words were more than just right, they released a pain between my lungs. I want this relationship, I want it and nevertheless I know I'm wrong. That I am not what Charles deserves. If only I had seen it earlier... I should never have let him so deep into my heart. Now he's suffering. All because of me. That's what I wanted to avoid from the beginning.
I wasn't wrong this time. This time it was really the blood in my ears, which rustled like a loud waterfall. We were silent, I was staring at the coffee table in the middle of the sofa corner. The refrigerator cracked, even the clock was heard ticking. It was so quiet. Tik, tak, tik, tak...
I didn't dare to look at Charles, even though it would be my turn to say something. Even if only a short sentence, but nothing left my throat. Like last time he talked to me about his fear for me.

A key that was turned in the lock redeemed me from the situation that was left between us again with heavy words. I got up, even if only on shaky legs, and hurried to the door. Elmo followed me with Charles. In the next moment, Mara and her husband stepped in and I put on my typical smile, with which I had served customers all week. „Mara, how do you get the key?" I researched, as a distraction of my inner hurricane.

„I stupid had him in my handbag," she clapped her forehead, rolling her eyes. „I see you have company?!," she walked around me and shook Charles' hand. He introduced himself to her, and at the same moment I realized that she didn't know anything about my boyfriend yet.

„Sweetie? When did you want to tell me about him?" She stood completely interested between me and Charles. „A very long story. I'll tell you when else. But we would like to go now," I said hurrying and took Charles' hand.

„Thank you for taking care of the girls or rather you two," she improved herself. Have a nice evening," she winked at me and then opened the door for us. We quickly slop into our shoes, I grabbed my stuff and also said goodbye to the two adults. Then we stepped into the darkness of the night and up to my car, there was nothing but silence between us. I was just about to open the door of my car when Charles grabbed my hand. „Célina!" his cool voice tore me apart in the air. I turned around, slowly and uncertainly. „If you don't want to talk, I accept that, but I'm here for you, okay?" he pulled me into his arms and pressed me tightly against his chest. I felt my facade slowly crumbling, but forced me to displace the rising tears of frustration and fatigue.

„I have to go home now," I murmured and writhed out of Charles' arms. My legs were so lame that they were just carrying me until I opened my car door. I let Elmo climb into the passenger's footwell and then opened the driver's door. I sank into the light leather seat and put my bag on the passenger's seat. Charles leaned down to me and kissed me on the cheek, on the forehead and the tip of my nose. This caused tender goose bumps all over my body. „Come home well," he whispered at the end and smiled as a farewell. I also smiled and waved as I steered my car out of the parking space. The dizziness behind my forehead danced foxtrot, but I tried not to be irritated by it. Just straight ahead.

When I got home, I shoveled up my last strength and climbed the stairs with Elmo, along the hallway in my apartment into the bedroom and there I sank onto my bed. I threw my shoes together with my work clothes in front of the bed and put on my sleeping shirt. Meanwhile, Elmo lay down in his seat. The last thing I did before going to bed was to look at my cell phone. I hoped to finally receive an answer from Linnea, but nothing. Maybe I shouldn't have tried to contact her...