My Life with the Rymans

Chapter 30

Jillian returns to the party about 15 minutes later and goes right into the bathroom. Sam and I quickly follow behind. "Here, I bought 3 different brands." She sits Sam on the toilet seat and kneels in front of her. "Listen, babe. If these are positive we will get through this together," she looks and me and I nod. She continues, "you can get an abortion. It sucks but it was the right decision for me. You don't even have to tell Brooks' if you don't want to. It's your body, babe. You get to make the choice. Nobody else." Sam looks away and starts to cry. "That's the thing, Jill. I don't know if it's Brooks'." She throws her head in her hands. My eyes go so wide I feel like they might pop out of my head. Jillian clears her throat, "um, okay, Sam. I'm gonna need a little more info here, honey." Sam takes a deep breath and after what seems like ages finally says, "I slept with Jason 3 weeks ago. Just once. He came over to get some of his things and it just...happened. I'm the worst human being in the world," she sobs. I sigh and say, "Samantha Bailey. There is nothing wrong with you! Shit happens. We know you love Brooks. It's okay, Sammy. We're not going to worry about that part right now." Jillian laughs, "uh, I am! You hot little slut! Sammy Ann, I didn't know you had it in you," I wonder if this is the right time for Jillian to say something like that but Sam starts laughing and her crying stops. I smile, Jillian is an amazing friend.

Three pregnancy tests sit on the bathroom vanity as the three of us wait on pins and needles. I'm pretty sure Sam has chewed every single fingernail to the cuticle. My heart is pounding and Jillian keeps pacing the floor. After a minute or so Jillian speaks up, "I think it's been 5 minutes. Want me to look first and tell you?", she asks Sam. Sam nods frantically and hides her face behind her hands, still sitting on the toilet. Jillian holds each test one by one and places them down. She shows zero emotion on her face and walks towards Sam. "I'm getting you a drink because that shit is NEGATIVE, BITCH!". We all scream in unison and Sam jumps into Jillian's arms. I'm sure someone hears us in here and thinks someone is legitimately dying. "Are you sure?", Sam asks. "Look at 'em, baby!", Jillian says. Sam looks at each test and sighs with relief. "I'm sure your period will come soon. And if not by Monday, take another test to be sure. But these should definitely be accurate." Sam sits back on the toilet and says, "what do I tell Brooks? About Jason?", Jillian says immediately, "you tell him absolutely nothing. Not right now at least. If you feel convicted enough that you have to, wait until it's just you two and after you've had a great, sober day together. Be prepared for the worst, Sam. But we're not worrying about that tonight, one thing at a time, let's get that drink, babe."

We go into the kitchen and luckily nobody seems to have even noticed our absence except Devin as he walks right to me. "There you are." I don't look at him. "Here I am," I repeat and sip my margarita. "I wasn't sure if you were here or not but Beth said she saw you guys in here earlier but I couldn't find you," he says. "Yeah, we were talking to Sam about something. I didn't see you when I got here so I assumed you were busy," I say flippantly. He looks confused, as he should be. "Busy? What are you talking about? I was outside talking to the guys waiting for you to get here. What's wrong?" I don't say anything. "Come on, let's go in here and talk." He leads me to a bedroom off the hall.

"What's going on, Liz? You were weird when we left dinner and now you're barely talking to me. What did I do?" He genuinely asks. I feel like an asshole. "It's what you said to my dad earlier when he asked about our relationship. You said we were 'just hanging out and having fun'," I say with air quotes. "Is that was this is about? Aren't we having fun?", he asks in a low tone. "Well, yeah, Devin but we're in a relationship. We love each other. You made it seem like we were just friends or like we weren't serious at all. It caught me off guard," I say and cross my arms. He takes my arms and uncrosses them and holds my hands. "Baby, your dad caught me off guard. That's all. I definitely did not mean to make you feel that way or make you question my love for you. I wasn't expecting the question and it threw me. Of course we are serious and of course we love each other. I'm sorry." I sit for a second thinking and then I hug him. "No, I'm sorry. I overreacted and pouted like a little bitch when I should've just talked to you. That wasn't fair," I say. He tilts my chin to his face. "You know I love you, baby. Are we good?" I smile, "yes, we're good. I love you." He brings my lips to his. "Now let's not waste the evening in here unless we're doing it naked," he teases. "Oh, Devin. Definitely, most definitely, later," I say giggling. "I'm holding you to it," he says as he opens the door.