The blue-eyed raven (Rivamika fanfiction)

CHAPTER 31

Hey!

A long chapter ahead :) hope you like it and don't forget to comment or vote...

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I was sweating all over when I yanked my body up and screamed his name.

My forehead was drowning in sweat, but so were my cheeks, because for some odd reason, I was crying in my sleep. My throat was dry and hurting and my heartbeat was a wild fire. Energy was floating in my body like a light liquid and I had to cup my face to sustain it. Trembling all over, I soon enough calmed and took a heavy breath before eyeing the place around me.

I was in my bedroom – my so goddamn familiar geeky bedroom, where I came back from the hospital only a few weeks ago. Relaxing my tense muscles, my mind slowly came back to reality:

It has been a month after the accident. And the dreams haven't left me since I came back home. Every freaking night I would curve into a ball and scream in my sleep, think about Levi and have the same nightmares on repeat. I would travel across the hospital, till I would eventually find him, talk to him and then he would leave with my heart broken all across the room, because every SINGLE time, I wouldn't stop him from going.

I couldn't stop him from leaving me all over again.

It has been hard for me these past few weeks, since I arrived back home. I can't sleep, can't eat properly, can't even go with my usual day, if I always think about, how different it would be, how better it would be, if I hadn't done, what I have.

It would be so much better.

Checking my clock on my night table, I soon realized, I woke up at 3 am. Again. I sighed and got up, since it would be quite stupid to try and sleep after such horrible nightmare. Plus, I was kind of hungry as hell and I had to get myself together. I got my lazy body out of my bedroom and across the creepy silent hallway, towards our lovely kitchen. The place was really dark and it kind of gave me creeps, since only my footsteps echoed across the rooms. But, then again, everyone else was asleep, since my parents had to go to work and Eren had to go to school.

Luckily, I didn't have to.

The whole thing got quite complicated since I've beaten up Petra and nearly got myself killed. Cut the story short, my parents decided it would be easy to start over again. No... I decided to start over – it sucked, since I'll have to make new friends all over, completely forget about everything I have here and mostly – forget Levi. It hurt, thinking how none of them, my friends and him, will know, I'm going away again, but it was easier, not to hurt them and just disappear one day without them knowing, or worse, freak out.

Don't get me wrong, I'll miss them deeply and it will be hard to do this all over again, but it was for the better.

Plus, I have Eren – as soon as he found out, I'll stop going to this school, firstly like I'm still 'recovering' from the accident, but secondly, I would completely disappear, he objected immediately. We ended up fighting but eventually agreeing, that if I really do it, he'll be there with me. It would mean, he will leave his friends, the best environment and everything good for him, but he wants to see me happy. He wants to protect me, since he said; I've done that for him my whole life.

I couldn't simply fight with him. It means a world to me, but seeing him suffer with me just breaks my heart. But, as far as I know him; he won't change his mind on this one.

We're leaving – and that's for certain. We just don't know when and where yet, but we're preparing for it.

We'll just simply float away and leave this place in ruins, build up with broken hearts and bleeding souls. It sounds harsh and evil, but we have to get our lives for the better first.