Flip Me

1.9

Harry
____

"Why are you angry at me?" Both Dylan and I were practicing handstands at training. He lunges forward as he speaks, and I do the same. Subconsciously I try to stay up longer then him as if It'll give me an upper hand, but I eventually fall down just second before he does.

"I'm not." We shake out our aching shoulders and kick up into handstand once again, this time he comes down first and I fight my childish smile away.

"You've ignored me and Effy all day. Do you really think I wouldn't notice you running down the hall and ditching French?" He was talking while in handstand and I loathed how much stronger he was then me. I loathed him for many things, his confidence, charm... Effy.

"I said I'm not mad." The feeling of wanting to tell him rose in my throat. I wanted to scream and shout at him but I pushed those emotions down.

"Jesus Harry, don't be a pussy and just tell me. It's not like I'm going to go around and-"

"You kissed Effy!" I shout louder then I should, and earned looks from smaller gymnast, "Fuck- I mean- I saw you kissing Effy."

"Um-" I think that's the first time I've ever seen Dylan at a loss for words and if I wasn't so upset I'd be satisfied.

"I walked to her house after our guy's night and I climbed up the side of her house like we used to do but you there and -"

"Listen Harry I-"

"It's okay it's none of my business." But it was my business I thought deeply to myself. I don't know why but it feels like it should be my business.

"It was one time, I came over to ask about French and we just-"

I really wanted to ask about all the things they said and all the unfinished sentences I heard but I didn't have the strength to. I was sad, desperately sad and I hated myself for it.

"It's fine I just wish you guys told me."

"Why?"

We both lunged forward and back into handstand. As I sucked in my stomach and gripped my fingers onto the floor to make sure I didn't fall over I lied, "Because I don't want Kiara to get hurt. We are all friends and I just really don't want drama."

"Then don't tell Kiara."

"You must be joking."

"I like her a lot and you know I make mistakes Harry, I'm not like you I'm not perfect."

"I'm far from perfect-"

"Regardless, I don't want to loose Kiara and me and Effy was just a one time thing..." I wanted to believe him, I really really did, but I couldn't. However I sucked it up; I let his words slide despite the feeling in my stomach that I shouldn't.

"Okay?" He asked almost nervous. The churning in my stomach was telling me to not promise anything, but Dylan is right, I am a pussy, I don't face the things that I want.

"Okay."

***

I've been ignoring Ashley's texts ever since I got home from training. I didn't really want to to talk to anyone and I was glad that my mother was doing an overnight shift.

In my thoughts I was trying to figure out all that went wrong. All I ever wanted was to be seen. I changed my look and it seems like all the problems I dreaded occurred.

1. My girlfriend is crazy
2. Dylan isn't who I thought he was
and...
3. I like someone who I can't have

I like Effy

I didn't realize it until now. Laying out my problems cleared the way to her and no matter how hard I held my chest I couldn't stop the aching pain.

I slammed my head against my soft pillow to wrap my head around the full thing. It was to late to deny my feelings. They were full force and strong. Would I tell her? Do I ignore it? It was something I'd have to decided when I'd see her.

As my mind swirls my phone goes off, revealing the one person that never leaves my mind:

From Effy
Look outside.
-

It was only two words. Look outside. Two words made up of 11 letters made my heart leap from my chest, and before I knew it my head was turned to look at the most infuriating and beautiful thing I think I've ever seen.

The rain that was pouring outside causes her dark hair to mat against her face structure, and although her make up was slightly smeared, it made her already beautiful eyes even bolder. Her petite frame smiled at me through the window and I had to not just fight the blood that was rushing straight to my jeans but the loud pumping off my heart.

"Open the window." She mouthed with a smile and as I slowly walked over I gulped down anything left in my already dry mouth and followed her instructions.

"Wh-what are you doing here?" I asked as her wet shoes squeaked against my floors.

"Came to see you." Her smile was small but cute and made my stomach flip upside down as she ran her hands just lightly under my chin. "I really wanted to see you."

Her feet began to move forwards, decreasing the space between us. I felt on fire as I awaited her next move. My skin was literally shaking as I watched her with wide eyes lean her head closer and closer. The anticipation was killing me from the inside out and I had to fight myself from collapsing with pleasure when her lips folded over mine.

Everything bubbled from the inside out as she kissed me so urgently. Her arms went straight to my hair and mine went straight to her waist pulling her deep into my arms.

You cant have her, you can't have her.

Despite this warmth I had to stop this here and now. I liked her and if I couldn't have her fully to myself then I didn't want her at all. I couldn't bare to share her with Dylan.

"Effy stop please." But her mouth still forced her way onto mine. "Please." I shouted, pushing her back.

"Fuck Harry what is it?" She was annoyed with me? Fuck! I should be annoyed with her, but she looked so cute with her wet hair and her body fit perfectly in her damp clothes.

"I- I can't do this. I really, really can't do this anymore."

"Why not? I know you want this. " And she was right, I did, I really fucking did.

"Th-that's not the point." Her eyes dropped to the ground as her bottom lip protruding out. "And fuck- stop pouting." She was getting to me and I had to end this quickly.

"Come on Harry." Her feet scurried towards me and I stumbled back onto the bed. Her body leaped onto my lap and her legs wrapped around my waist causing the fire in my stomach to turn into an inferno.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck stop Effy!" I lifted her off of me and pushed her down. I couldn't do this. She was messing with my head and I couldn't take it.

"Do you not want this? I thought after the washroom we-"

"You kissed Dylan!"

"What?" Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped.

"You kissed Dylan! I saw you kiss Dylan."

And before I could grab her arm, and before I could explain, she grabbed her coat off the floor and climbed back through the window and out into the pouring rain.

*********
I feel so bad I always leave you all on a cliff hanger i am laughing SORRY!! XOXO