Flip Me

3.6

Harry
____

The hallways were beginning to empty. It was terrifying and also riveting. I was pulling old worksheets and textbooks out of my locker, making sure to wipe it down and rip all the photos that hung to the door. Tomorrow was graduation and that meant, that tomorrow marked my last day of being me. I would be able to start fresh, and forget about the aches and shivers of being in the same space as Effy.

My chipped nails hung tightly to the sweater that Effy bought for me, and like the rest of this year and it's memories... I tossed it into the large garbage bag.

I could almost imagine what it would of been like if her feelings for me where genuine, and her plan to use me for a scholarship never existed. I would of applied to the school she got in to, we would go to university together and happily. I would pay for an apartment for the both of us and one day, after small fights, and a lot of love we'd get married. That's what I picutred with her.

Looking back at it now I know how silly my thoughts were.

I slammed my locker shut and walked through the empty hall. I didn't want to clean out my locker in last period like everyone else. The noise would have distracted me from the nostalgic state that I was in. So, I waited in the library until everyone left.

My shoes squeaked against the white tiled floors as I shoved the garbage bag into the grey bins just around the corner, and as I turned around I was shocked by the presences of the last person I would think to see here.

"Holy shit! Don't scare me like that!" I huffed out, holding onto my chest, just to make sure that I wasn't dying.

"Sorry, I was just cleaning my locker and needed to throw some stuff out." Through all the makeup and fancy clothes, Ashley looked almost exhausted.

"Me too." I whispered. There was a lot I wanted to say to her.

"I", "Well"... We both said at the same time. Small chuckles filled the hallway as she shoved her bag into the bin and dusted her hands on her pants.

"What were you going to say?" I asked. Hopefully it wasn't a snarky comment, or something to finally get me back for the harsh words I told her.

To my surprise her shoulders began to shake as her head fell into her hands. "Are you crying?" I almost laughed out in amazement. Sniffles were in the air. I didn't know what to do.

"I always knew he didn't love her. Even when he would buy her expensive jewelry or stayed for two nights instead of one I knew he never loved her." She was coughing over her words as I stared at her, trying to peace together what she saying...

"He would always be on his phone, home once a week. I knew it wasn't business. One day when I went to surprise him at his office for lunch his receptionist wasn't there to buzz me in and it all made sense. He was bending her over his fucking desk." I wrapped my arms around her, trying to stop her shaking body. "And all this time my mom knew. She knew my father didn't love her, she knew he was using her, but she was using him to. Money does shit to people."

It was all making sense. She was never a bitch, she was just hurting, the same way I am.

"I go home and I see them acting so incredibly fake. I am just..." She took a deep breathe, finally letting her hands stop pressing into her face "... So excited to leave here."

"Me too." Was all I could say because my thoughts were swimming in understanding and pity.

"I'm sorry." She whispered, leaning her head into me.

"I'm sorry too." Although the words made me feel better she was shaking her head against my chest. Her fingers were wiping smeared make up under her eyes.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. What you said to me was anger that I created. I just wanted us to work. I knew you loved Effy but in my head I just wanted you to choose me, because then that would mean that I can be loved."

Now it was my turn to shake my head. I don't remember how we got to sitting on the school floors, our backs against the walls and my arms hung around her but it didn't matter. "I always loved you Ashley. Of course it's not that kind of love, but you can be loved in all different types of ways. I thought I was madly in love with you for so long but now I understand. I get that love is in all forms. I love you Ashley, in a way that isn't just a friendly love, but a hope that you get all that you wanted in life love."

She was crying again, sniffling into my shirt. "I knew about Effy. I hooked up with Dylan when he was drunk and he told me. I am sorry." It seems that this was a time for her where she could finally spill the truth.

"I forgive you." And I meant it. "A lot of people know things they shouldn't, and maybe you should of told me but I am glad I found out this way. I can grow from this." I was trying to convince myself. I was pushing my brain to accept it.

"You really were a good boyfriend." She smiled.

"I really wasn't."

"It's not about what you did Harry, it's about how you felt. You are the most sweetest, sincere, guy I know and with the track record I have, you are the best boyfriend I ever had. Effy is a dumb bitch for doing this to you."

"Yeah." Was all I could say.

Ashley stood up. She grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet as well. "See you at graduation?" She asked.

"Of course." And it was the first time ever actually hugged her. My lips kissed her on the head before she released from my grip, a smile on her face. "I love you Ashley, and on day someone will really love you."

"Love you too."

I watched her walk away, and like my locker was nostalgic, watching her open the door and walk away from me was like a revelation.

I love Ashley because she taught me a lot about myself. I don't need to change to have someone love me, but also I needed that make over to revive myself. I love Ashley because she was a big part of my life even when she didn't think it. I love Ashley because even though she was mean, she was doing it for a reason. And when your mean for a purpose, it means you have a heart.

My feet carried me to the front door for possibly the last time, and as I opened the door to the bright sunny afternoon I felt my body relax, and my mouth turn into a smile, because;

Love is in all colours. I love Ashley like red, Kiara like yellow, I love Effy as wide as a rainbow; and even though she hurt me to no end, I know it will be okay.

Because she did it for a reason. And when you do something for a purpose, it means you have a heart.

**********

Awe Harry's little revelation was so cute! He's hurting, but he's okay!

The next chapter is Graduation Part 1!

xo