Kiss me again. [An All Time Low Fan- Fic.]

Chapter 47: I'm Gonna Break Down These Walls.

*Alex's POV*

"Hey mum." It had been three more days since i've been back home in England with mum and dad and it's gotten to the point where I've talked to them, their friends, and gone so many places with them so much that my accent has pulled through and taken over. I tried stopping it, but it's like the saying goes, once you go black, you never go back.. But.. Not. 

I went and sat myself up on the back of the couch, where I would rarely ever find my mom sitting. "Can I talk to you about something for a minute? Outside preferably." I gestured to dad who was pretending to be oblivious, but of course his eyes gave him away.. As always. 

"Sure, let me just get a glass of Lemonade and you, me, and Baz can go out there for awhile." She was in a chipper mood and my heart was racing. I didn't want to be the one to damper her good mood, but I felt it was time to talk to her about Cameo. That was the main reason I'd come anyways, so it needed to be addressed. I nodded though, and slid off the couch and crossed behind my dad, who whispered, good luck, and I opened the glass door. 

"Come on Baz! Outside!" I patted my knee and whistled for him. Sure enough, he was scuttling along the hardwood floors and scooting outside past me because he couldn't stop himself. I laughed, easing myself and following him. I plopped in a lawn chair and started throwing a toy across the lawn for him whil I waited for mum.

"Alright." She grunted as she eased herself into a chair next to me. "What's all the secrecy about?" She smiled at me and I avoided eye contact as I spoke.

"I haven't texted or talked to Cameo in two days now.. Not that that's a big deal or anything, but I haven't, because I told her I was going to talk to you." 

"Me? About what?"

"About how you don't like her, and why after all this time you can't be happy for me and her and accept us. I just don't get it either sometimes, but I always tell her it's not a big deal and not everyone is going to like us together and it's not her it's just them and.. I feel like my emotions are starting to rub raw form the hate mum." I sighed tiredly when I thought about the hater fan base and my mum here that was voting along with them. "Mum, I really want you to listen to what I'm about to say, I mean, EVERYTHING I'm about to say with an open mind. Please." I looked over at her and she was staring back with a serious expression on her face. Her mouth was clamped shut and her eyes looked grim with emotions I couldn't even read.

"I'm.. Not opposed to the idea." She finally mustered and I relaxed a little.

"I really, really love her. I never thought that there would be another girl for me after Lisa. Lisa and I were together since high school, it's been forever and I've been through what I thought, was everything with that girl. But it wasn't, and turns out, she wasn't the right one for me or it all would've worked out. It took a long time for me to cope with that and say my goodbyes to everything her and I had. But I managed and turns out, I felt like shit afterwards, I just kept it buried deep, deep down inside for everyone, especially the fans. I couldn't taint every song with my hate and lust for her again after the cheating and the fighting and the breakup.. But then, because of some stupid thought that Jack and I had, that wasn't even suppose to be real, actually became real, and we went to that Brokencyde show and when I met Cameo, and her younger cousin Hannah, it was so much fun." I took a deep breath and kept going when my mind caught up with my mouth. "It was like a breath of fresh air, and for once in a long time, I wasn't pretending to be having a good time or faking that I was okay, because I actually was. They made me, that night made me, forget about all the sadness that was going on." I smiled involuntarily at the thoughts of that night and the ones that continued on after. "From then on I talked to her and stayed in touch with her everynight of everyday and when I could and we were playing a show nearbye I'd visit. She understood me, we talked as friends and stayed in the friend zone for months together mum! But I didn't care because she understood me and she was easy to talk to. When we finally kissed, and she came and stayed on tour with us, I knew how much she really meant to me.. I just never knew that feeling would grow so rapidly after that." I was still smiling from ear to ear, I even chuckled at how ridiculous I probably sounded. Like a damn lovesick fool I bet. "But of course, before we offically got together as a couple, there were complications. Rian hated the idea, like you. He thought the age thing was a bad image for All Time Low and that she would ruin me, like I was digging my grave years ahead of my origional time. He didn't try and get to know her, he didn't want to, and he in turn, tried to be an asshole and cause problems with me, and with her and I ever chance he could. It sucked, and because she let him get in her head for a period of time, I almost lost her.." I shuttered at the thought of not being with Cameo today and my smile faultered. I looked back at my mom, rubbing my damp, sweaty hands together and trying to see if she was still listening. 

"Go on." She barely spoke. She was watching me with sadness in her eyes and pity in her frown lines at the corners of her mouth.

"But we got through it, and now, just recently, have her and Rian talked, and have come to some sort of understanding where they're both civilized towards one another and I think he actually likes her now, even if it's justn a little it's something. And it's such a good something mum, that when we all get together, because we can now, there's no tension anymore. It's made everything easier on us." I took a deep breath and licked my lips, getting down to the ending of my speech that I REALLY wanted my mom to come to terms with. "Mum, I want to marry and have kids with this girl. She's given me hope, happiness, strength, raw emotions, inspiration, and most importantly, love. I love her, and I see myself forever with her. The problem is, she.. And I, want no tension if we got married. So she declines me every time I ask because she thinks you and dad won't come to the wedding, or visit because she's around, or suck up your pride and be civilized when we have kids so you won't be in your grandchild's life. You mean a lot to her mum, now dad likes her.. He's given her a chance, how come you can't?" 

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*Isobel's POV*

I was in shock, Alex wanted to marry her? I forced my mouth to stay closed as I studied his face. He was so serious and it was now that I really understood where he was coming from. I sighed and looked away, out to the lawn at Baz laying on the green grass chewing on his toy. 

Should I consider the idea of him actually taking her hand in marriage? Having kids? Living with her forever? After all.. He is happy, and I've always said all I've ever wanted if for my son to be happy, and he really deserves that in his life. 

I looked back over at Alex and we was laying back in the lawn chair, covering his mouth with one of his hands, trying to look like he was thinking hard but I knew better. He was trying not to break down. "Alexander, look.. I want you to be happy. Maybe I haven't been fair to you and her, but I don't know if I could ever like her, or consider her family, even if you do get married and have childeren. I want whatever you want, and I'm happy you have a home aside from this one to go to and that you love someone who completes you and you now have everything you've ever wanted. But, maybe, I can tuck away my pride when it comes to a visit there or one here." He still wouldn't look at me but I could see in his eyes he was listening. "For the record as well, I would never miss a moment with my grandkids if you two had them, nor would I miss my son's wedding if you two got married." I tried to give him a reassuring smile.

"I guess for now, that's all I can ask for." 

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*Alex's POV*

We walked back inside quietly, Baz jumping at our heels to tell us he was hungry. My mom beckoned my dad to the bedroom, I assumed to talk about what had just happened, so I went to the kitchen to feed the dog. 

The conversation I'd had with my mom made me miss Cameo so much more, and I was ready to go home, but I knew inside, I needed to stay and work a few more things out with my mum. Get to a happier place again, and I was thinking constantly of how to do it.

I finished feeding Baz and lithed my way to my boring room to nap. I flopped on my back on the bed and covered my face with my hands. "God, if only.." I trailed off when i thought about texting her again, but knew it'd just be tag again and again. "You're just miles away.." I sighed and snapped up suddenly in bed. An idea popped in my head, cracking a smile on my face as I snatched up my acoustic again and started strumming those chords that I conjured up not too long ago. The lyrics started forming in mey head. I dropped the guitar and ran out to the office room in the house, rummaging around for a pencil and some paper. When I found it, I bounded to the room with joy and closed the door loudly behind me, but too excited to care. I threw the things down on my bed and got to writing the lyrics that kept coming up like bile in my throat.