The Secret Five #Wattys2016

Day 27-Hadley

         It's been okay here. I'm scared and just wanting to go back home. I try and be around everyone, but, I can't always be around them, especially around Trace and Anya now. They have been getting closer ever since Trace kissed Anya while they were fighting.

It's difficult sometimes because I see Locklyn and Cason and how they look at each other and you know they love each other. I believe I will never have that love or spark like they do because their relationship is so strong. I feel lost and alone. I feel like they are forgetting about me and I know that may not be the case, but that is how I feel. As Locklyn would say, 'feelings are just the underlying emotions you cannot show to people'.

I lay in my bed and stared at the ceiling. Everyone else was sleeping besides Cason and Locklyn who were making noise next door. I shook my head, got out of bed, and opened my door slowly. I walked past Locklyn and Cason's bedroom, down the stairs, and into the kitchen. I took out the pitcher of lemonade and poured myself a glass.

I sat at the kitchen table and continued to work on the puzzle we started a couple days ago. Sleeping is hard, especially when all you have ever known was city night life and the sirens and sounds of people yelling. Now, it is quiet, dead silence, and the only thing you can hear is Trace snoring or Locklyn and Cason having sex.

Back in New York, we went to a private school called The Witting Academy, and it was in the town of Concord, which is about three hours north of the city. We all lived in the same town, Quincy, but I lived near the city part of Quincy while the rest lived past the city and almost into Concord. Anya lived closer to me and would pick me up and bring me to school. For years I also had to deal with crying babies in the middle of the night and my parents yelling at each other to figure out who will be the one to get up and take care of the baby. I miss all the noise.

After an hour of working on the puzzle I heard something coming from the basement. I stared at the door for a minute until I heard a scream. I stood up slowly and crept towards the door. I opened the door and turned the light on and listened some more. The scream happened again and it sounded like a girl.

I ran down the stairs, searched the whole basement including the room Cason built, and saw no one down here. The scream happened once more and was near the stairs. I kept hearing the scream and was very scared. I ran back upstairs to the bedrooms and knocked on Anya's door.

"Anya, open up!" I said quickly. She opened the door and moaned.

"What do you want, Hadley?" She wasn't too happy I woke her up. She crawled back into bed and said, "It's one in the morning, it better be important if you are waking me up."

"Someone is screaming in the basement."

"No one is in the basement. Everyone is in their bedroom."

"Anya, someone is down there! I keep hearing a scream and when I went down there to check, no one is there. Someone is hurt; I keep hearing the scream."

She sat up in bed. "First off, what are you doing downstairs anyway when you are supposed to be sleeping?"

"I can't sleep, so, I got up, got something to drink and started to work on the puzzle. Sleeping is difficult for me because it is so damn quiet. I need noise and I'm freaking out over here."

"Stop freaking out." She got out of bed and put her robe on. "Lets go, Hadley. I'm tired and would really like to sleep." Anya followed me to the kitchen and went to the door of the basement. She listened. "I don't hear anything. I told you, nothing is down there. Go to bed." She slammed the door shut and I heard the scream again. Anya froze and stared at me with wide eyes.

"I told you," I whispered.

She shook her head, opened the basement door, and listened once more. It happened again and she turned the light on and ran down the steps, jumping over the last two. I followed her and watched from the steps at what she was doing. She was checking everything, making sure nothing is out of place.

"No one is down here though." I shrugged and wrapped my arms around my body. I was freezing and scared and the anxiety was building as she kept looking around the basement. "Hadley," Anya came around the corner. "It's late and I don't see anyone down here. First thing in the morning, we will have one of the boys check down here and see if someone was here. I don't hear the screaming anymore, do you?" I shook my head. "I'm going back to bed and you should too." She walked past me, shut the light, and continued to go upstairs to her room. I heard her slam the door and go to bed.

I stood on the steps and looked up at the light from the kitchen. The scream isn't here anymore and it may have been the wind, hopefully it was the wind. Whatever it was, it scared me and now, sleeping isn't going to happen.

I stayed in the living room with the television on low and watched the national news. Nothing has come up about us basically vanishing into thin air. Do our parents even care or is everything just pretend?

When I was younger, I always thought Colleen and I came from a different family. We don't look like everyone else, we look like sisters, but my younger siblings look nothing like us. We don't even look like our parents. I remember I asked my father if I came from someone else's tummy and all he did was shake his head, told me to go to my room, and stay there since my mother was in labor. It pissed me off and I screamed and yelled and basically threw a tantrum. Colleen asked my mother after she had my first brother, at the time we were only ten and nine, and it was weird to us that they waited a decade to have more children, and in a matter of five years, they had four more children. My mother said not now and to not ask silly questions.

Colleen and I have a darker complexion than my parents and siblings. My father does have some Native American descent in him, but it shouldn't be so dominant in his two oldest daughters and not so dominant in his four younger children. My mother is of Italian and Russian descent, so, she has lighter skin than my father, but not by much.

Right before I was taken away and sent to this cabin, Colleen and I sent in our DNA to have it tested and see if our parents are our real parents. She may know the results by now and I may never know and have this thought of who and why.

I wouldn't be upset or angry if I was adopted, I would be grateful I have parents who love me for me, and know they took in someone else's children. I would be upset and angry that they kept it from me my whole life and made me believe I was their child. Whatever the outcome is, whether I am their biological child or adopted, I'll still love my parents and siblings the same and it wouldn't change my relationship with my family. At least I'll have the truth.

I woke up the next morning to the television off, a blanket on top of me, and the lights off. I was confused on where I was and what happened last night. I sat up slowly, looked around the room, and stood up to go into the kitchen. Everyone was outside by the pond, relaxing.

I poured myself a glass of whiskey and drank it steadily. I watched out the window to see Cason and Locklyn cuddling in the hammock and Trace and Anya looking at each other with googly eyes. I sighed and shook my head.

I chugged the glass I had, poured myself another, and stomped upstairs to my room. I slammed my door shut and tears began to fall down my face. I leaned against my door and slowly slid down, hitting the floor hard, and pulling my knees to my chest. I put the drink I had on the floor next to me and covered my face, crying into my hands hysterically.

"Why?" I whispered. "Why aren't you here with us, with me?" I looked up at the ceiling. "It's not fair. None of this is fair."

"I'm here," I heard his voice, faintly, but I heard it. "I'm here, Sadie." I cried harder. "I never left. I will always be with you. Remember, you have to be strong, for Anya, Trace, Locklyn, and Cason, you can't show them this side of you or they will find out. They will know about us and what we shared. They can never find out, for as long as you live, they can't find out, especially Anya, or she will kill you."

"Okay," I whispered.

"Promise me, Sadie." I sighed. "You have to promise me. Do you? Do you promise never to tell anyone about us?"

"I promise to never tell anyone, I promise," I cried into my hands and soon chugged the glass of whiskey I had next to me.