Hatred [Haylor AU]

3 3

CHAPTER 33:
Fucking questions
keeps on fucking coming.

{UNEDITED}
For the past few minutes, all I could hear is my best friend calling out my name, forcing me to leave my bed and get ready for breakfast. I felt my blanket being pulled away, my hand stayed still gripping the blanket. It was useless though, since there are three of them, the blanket left me letting the cold air attack me. I decided to ignore the cold feeling and shut my eyes closed.

SPLASH!

I felt a cold, freezing liquid being splashed to me making me jolt out of my bed, my eyes grew wide as I started shivering due to the cold water.

"Wh-hy di-id y-you d-do th-a-at?" I ask stuttering, giving myself a hug by placing my hands on my arms.

"Don't blame me," Karlie raises her hand, "it was Selena's idea."

I turn to give Selena a glare which she returned with a sheepish smile. Gigi wrap a towel on me, making me feel warm. I take my phone from the nightstand beside Karlie's bed.

11:45, the clock read.

"Shit, shit, shit," I cursed out loud. "Fuck, guys!"

"You're being weird," Selena said.

"No, no, no! I have to tutor harry at 12 and I'm not close to even being ready."

"Woah, girl. What?" Karlie ask in amusement. "Being ready? When did you start caring about how you look?"

"I don't. It's just that I'm wet. Very wet and my hair in wet and my clothes and I don't have time to shower anymore and he's going to be angry and why am I using too much 'and'?"

"Woah." Selena placed her hands on her hip. "This would be the first time you actually rant that much just for a damn tutoring session."

"I really don't need you guys interrogating and start assuming things about me and Harry."

"Taylor," Gigi said, "you have so much thoughts in your mind. Why don't you calm down for a minute and we'll help you get ready on time."

"How am I supposed to be on time when the drive from Karlie's house to mine takes like 15 minutes and it's raining."

"Calm down and go shower," Gigi ordered.

I sighed getting inside the bathroom to take a quick shower and brushing my teeth— with the toothbrush Karlie gave me— as well. In a matter of minutes I am now done and dressed with Karlie's white dress.

Once I reach my house, I was 3 minutes late and the rain got bigger and bigger. Harry is sitting in my front porch. Once he saw me, he came to me placing his hands on his shoulders.

"Why didn't you get in? The securities would've let you in." I ask Harry.

"Because I was fucking worried. Where the fuck have you been?"

"Karlie's house."

"And you are four minutes late," He added.

"Why are you being worried all of a sudden? Why do you care? Why are you like this? Why—" Harry interrupted my questions by kissing my lips.

And let me tell you, it's raining and we are kissing. We are kissing under the rain. And I kissed back. I enjoyed it. What the fuck is wrong with me? He pulled away slowly looking at me, touching my cheeks.

"Why did you kiss me?" I ask, "why do you always kiss me all of a sudden?"

"Stop fucking asking."

"I can't okay. What are we? Friends?"

"If you want us to be, then we are friends," he stated.

"Friends don't kiss like that," I said in a soft voice.

I felt my eyes getting watery all of a sudden, I blink a few times, threatening the tears not to spill. There are just so many questions I want to ask and he keeps avoiding it, and I can't live knowing this questions will always be in my head and never getting an answer.

"Harry, please talk," I pleaded. "You can't always do this! You make me feel over the moon every time and leave me hanging open. Why do I always like being kissed? Does it always feel like that? Or would it be the same if I kissed another guy? What is my relationship with Harry? Are we dating? Are we friends with benefits? Are we friends? Are we just friends who kiss all the time? What are we? This questions keeps on coming and coming!"

"Don't fucking kiss any other guy and change into something more appropriate your pink bra is showing," he said and with that he left.

He left me under the rain and all I could think of is how much it hurts and all the questions will always be a question. I just want to fucking shout at him for being such an asshole. This whole thing is so new to me and I don't know if I like him. Do I have feelings? Does being happy with a guy makes you like him? If I like his kisses, does it make me like him? Fuck, I fucking hate you Harry Styles. Why do you always fucking make me fucking question my fucking self? Fuck you. Fuck everyone. Fuck this shit.

And my fucking pink bra? Really? Is that the only thing he could think of? I hate him. I fucking hate him. I really fucking do. But why am I fucking crying? Why can't I stop fucking crying? Why am I feeling like this?

I wiped my tears away, shaking my head and wishing all the questions would stop. I just want to sleep.

"Why are you here?" A familiar voice ask.

I turn my head and saw Calvin and the only way to find out if kissing any guy would make me feel like this is to kiss another guy.

So I did, I fucking kiss him in the fucking lips and it didn't feel fucking right. It felt wrong. It was bad. And it felt wrong in every way. So I immediately pulled away. And the next thing I know, a punch was thrown at Calvin's face.

What have I done?

ASDFGHJKL:')
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