Whilst the boyfriends away

48.

It took me a good twenty minutes to compose myself in the car before I even thought about starting the engine, I feel so emotional after that argument. Aston has never spoken to me like that, and nor have I spoken to him in that way before. I'm just as confused about where we stand now, I thought we meant something, I hoped there was feelings, but the truth is like a stab to the heart. Maybe I was wrong to ever think in to Aston's actions, these nights in and family gatherings, but they've been so misleading these past weeks its been hard not to.

"Oh, hiya. I didn't expect you back so early," Charlie spoke with a mouthful of food sitting at the dinner table.

"Hey," I smiled.

"Everything alright?"

"Yeah, there was a change of plan that's all."

"Well there's some spaghetti bolognese left over if you want to join me."

"Thanks," I nodded dropping my bag on the couch and walking over to the cooker.

"I've not long made it. I popped to Tesco and stocked up the cupboards too, they looked a little bare."

"Yeah I've been meaning to go shopping."

"It's done now," he smiled.

Plating up some food on a plate and pouring myself a glass of water I sat down in the seat opposite.

"Do you not want any wine?" he asked.

"No, waters fine."

"If it's for the sake of me, then there's really no need."

"It's not, I just need something to quench my thirst. This is lovely," I said twirling some spaghetti around my fork.

"It's been awhile since I've been able to cook a nice meal, I've been dining out in Dubai."

"No change there then."

"I suppose not."

"Did you go to the doctors?" I mumbled.

He nodded. "They've referred me to the hospital next week."

"So they're concerned?"

"It's just to be safe, more tests and scans."

"Can they not fit you in any sooner?"

"No, you know what hospitals are like."

"What about medication?"

"I've got to continue my course."

"Right."

"I'm in the best hands babe, the hospital is just ten minutes away if I need it."

"Don't say that," I shuddered at the thought.

"Sorry."

Swinging my head around at the sound of goodness knows what clashing from behind I looked to Charlie concerned.

"It's alright, It's only Aston in the bathroom."

"He's home? I didn't see his car."

"Twenty minutes before you."

"Oh right."

"He's in some sort of mood, I'd stay clear."

"Yeah, I think I might tonight."

Now very satisfied with our dinner we made a start on clearing up together, Charlie loading up the dishwasher as I washed down the table. I must say he's being very helpful and considerate this evening, I don't remember the last time we lasted a whole mealtime without bickering or rushing away from the table.

Shutting myself in the bedroom for ten minutes I changed out of my work uniform and got ready for bed, my hair now in its usual messy bun and face completely free from make up. Sitting at my dressing table with my phone in my hand I flicked through a couple of messages from my Mum, the last time I visited I promised to return with Aston in a couple of weeks, but once again I've got to think of some pathetic excuse as to why he hasn't come. Although if things continue the way they are I don't think I'll even be able to go alone, and I certainly can't take Charlie never mind tell them that he's home and his reasons, they will be as understanding as Aston. They've seen him hurt me too many times.

Back in the living room Charlie picked up the remote and hoped to find something on TV to watch, it's weird to see him having a night but as relaxed as he seems I'm sure its driving him insane deep down. Aston, wandering to and from his bedroom in the scruffiest tracksuit bottoms I never thought he'd wear sat on the edge of the couch rummaging through the collection of xbox games they share, obviously staying in too.

"What one are you looking for?" Charlie asked him.

"Call of duty."

"Which?"

"Black Ops."

"It's in the player. Do you want a can?"

"Nah," he said simply taking the disk and leaving.

He can be so immature at times.

"I'm not trying anymore," Charlie muttered cracking a can open for himself.

"Leave him, he's being ridiculous now," I sighed.

"You've changed your tune."

"Well there's only so many times you can try, he's a grown man he will get over it soon."

"Has he told you what's pissed him off?"

I shrugged, "I think the lack of texts he's had from you has annoyed him, you are supposed to be friends," I lied, slightly.

"I haven't had time to speak to you so I certainly haven't him."

"Like I said, he'll get over it."

"Hmm," he mumbled putting the remote and his drink on the coffee table settling down to an episode of 'the idiot abroad.'

"Why are you drinking?" I asked.

"What?"

"I thought you weren't allowed to with your medication?"

"Oh. They've changed the tablets."

"You didn't say, you said.."

"I must have told you wrong then," he spoke over me ending the conversation there.

Tucking my feet up on the coach I started to go into a daydream thinking about Aston in the room next door. I thought him of all people would understand, we've been great these past few weeks and I've felt like I can tell him anything and have his support in return, but that conversation in the car was horrible. When Charlie left to work in Dubai and I was left here pretty much alone and Aston was the one by my side, he was a shoulder to cry on and I honestly don't think I could have coped with him. Sleeping with him wasn't ideal when you think about it, but I can't say I regret it as wrong as it is, it brought us closer and build what I thought was a solid relationship, or at least friendship. Ever since Charlie told me about these pains he's been having I've felt guilt, not only because of the cheating but because I now understand how he wants some support, how he needs a shoulder to cry on just like I did. I know it's completely different things but in basic terms he can't do this alone, and with his family just as busy as he usually is I'm all he's got, so how can I move out and forget all about him?

~♥️~

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