Chapter 36

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SURPRISE! I decided after talking to some of my favorite authors on Wattpad that the best thing to do would be to keep going with the book and just let time do it's thing. Which means..

NO BREAK! and I'm so relieved, I want to keep writing! love you guys xx

His lips had barely touched mine when he suddenly pulled back, his eyes wild and breath shaky. The candle that had been exploding in my chest went cold as I looked up at him pacing the room. He ran one of his hands through his hair, then placed it tightly to his side; His fingers scrunching and twisting like I've noticed before. It was painful to watch, what happened?

I could see him holding back yells in his throat and his face went red. It suddenly occurred to me he was hearing and feelings things again, just like how he had the other night. My heart stopped and I went into panic mode. Jumping up from the bed and crossing the room to stand in front of him.

"Harry," I said shakily, looking up into his eyes. Trying to somehow grab his attention. He pushed past me without so much as a glance, his senses focused on something I couldn't see. His hands flew up to his cheeks, hitting himself repeatedly before digging his nails into his face. 

"Harry," I squeaked again, trying but failing to pull his hands from his now glowing cheeks.

I watched as he began to tremble, in both fear and anger. His eyes shoot open, and like the volcano that was now Harry, erupted.

"GET OUT," he screamed, once again inserting his fingers into his now soaked hair, pulling ferociously at the roots.

I jumped as his voice boomed through the room, but I knew somehow that when he spoke, he wasn't talking to me. He collapsed onto the floor, earning a squeal from me. His knees pressed to the ground while his back hunched over, slamming his fists into the floor. Despite my fear, I bent down next  him, rubbing his back comfortingly as the sounds of his quiet yet strong sobs filled the room. And as if it never had before, my heart fell apart piece by piece. Along with an ounce of my hope.

"Shhhhhh.." I spoke softly, moving my hand up and down his damp back.

The sobs grew quieter and quieter, just until I realized they were no longer existent. I waited patiently as he re contained himself, sitting up softly. He pushed the hair stuck to his forehead back, exposing his quivering face. Choking back a gasp, I stared into his worn out face that reeked of exhaustion. Tears pricked at my eyes but I sucked them back in, I needed to be strong. For Harry.

He looked into my eyes, as he chuckled coldly. "Pitiful isn't it?"

My mouth hung open and I shook my head no, only making him breath out another icy laugh.

"Save yourself the time Ava, let me rot here. I'll be gone before you know."

I couldn't hold the tears back and they ran slowly down my face. "Stop Harry.." I whispered, scooting closer eagerly.

He grinned at this, but it wasn't genuine. It was foreign, and not Harry. He was in there somewhere, I know he was.

"You can't save me Ava. No matter how much Anne or the others tell you."

I shook my head again, at a complete lose for words. How could someone as magnificent as Harry think so lowly of himself. My breathing stayed shaky as he continued looking down.

"It's quite sad, don't you think?"

I couldn't take it anymore. "That's enough Harry," I said desperately, taking one of his trembling hands in mine. "You can't do this to yourself."

He ripped his hand away from my palm. "You don't get it do you?" he spoke lowly, his voice eerily calm. "I am hopeless Ava. Hopeless. You think I haven't tried digging myself out of this hell hole?"

He was yelling now, standing to his feet and hovering over me. "Well I have. I've only got buried deeper. And if you don't let me suffer alone," he said pausing for a moment, his eyes hardening, "I'll end up taking you with me."

His breathing was erratic and I noticed I was now standing. He stopped pacing, taking the spot close in front me me. Looking at me with hurt eyes, he took up my chin.

"And I would kill before I would allow anyone to do that to you." 

He spoke softly and my heart began to slow. We stood silently, looking at each other, our chest touching. I looked down at our feet, thinking for a moment before looking back up at him.

"I'm not going anywhere." 

Short chapter, yes I know, but I'm home sick and I feel like death ugghhhh.

But are you guys enjoying the small Hava moments in this chapter? 

Should the ship name be Hava or something else?  I'm not very creative so comment or message me with suggestions!

-kenzie

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