Looking for the Light Through the Darkness

Chapter 80: Clinging

Leaning against the the couch, I take slow calming breaths as I listen to the noises of the apartment. It is clear that most are resting but every once and a while there is a sudden amount of shifting from the far side of the building letting me know that some of my loved ones are still hurting.

Rubbing the scars covering my eyes, I trace the slight ridges created from the bandages that once were there and those dead eyes appear in my mind. Shuttering, I force another breath and quickly refocus on the soft sound of rain pattering on the roof.

"Sang?" The soft voice comes from the right side of the room. Smiling softly, I shift slightly on the couch, letting the male know he was welcome on the couch. "You okay?" Corey whispers sitting besides me with his laptop.

Nodding, I rub my hands slowly over the textured blanket. "Just waiting. Gabriel just fell asleep, he has a fever. Silas is still being looked over and North is by his side." I whisper running my hand over the blanket. "Raven is keeping me updated."

"I understand, you must be worried, but I'm sure the others would want to to rest." The words hang in the air and I bite hard on my inner lip. Worried didn't even come close to describing how I was feeling. Not only had I dragged nine of the most wonderful males into my problems but I also added another five. Guilty was the right descriptor.

Guilty that some of the people I had grown to love have been hurt not once but now twice. What would happen if I lost...

Those dead eyes reappear in my mind and my stomach tightens uncomfortably. "Cory? Sang?" The grumblings of a very tired Russian enters the room and I straighten.

"Silas?" I whisper toward the voice all of my energy disappearing.

"Awake. Fully functional. East is with him." Raven states another yawn hitting him as a bundle of nerves hits me hard in the chest. Sitting back down, I must zone out because suddenly someones hand is cupping my cheek.

The scent of gun powder rushes over me and suddenly I am drawn into powerful arms. "Cor, get Blackbourne." He growls resting me against his chest as I force uneven breaths through the terrible pit in my stomach.

"Damnit Birdie." I hear the Russian whisper slightly under his breath. Realizing I have been lifted up in the air, I am unable to control the tears of relief that slip down my cheeks when suddenly the scent of Irish Spring Soap washes over me.

"Owen." I wheeze and hands grab me from the Russian pressing me against a solid chest. Digging my fingers into his back, I cling as the weight of the day washes over me.

"Thank you both." I hear Owen whisper as he leaves the room but he stays in the hallway gently rocking me as I completely loose control of my feelings.

Feeling calloused finger pads touch my back, I manage a small breath as I hold tightly to the shirt of the male before me. Feeling the air move around us, I can feel the air change suddenly as we enter another room.

"Owen?" the exhausted Sean whispers from what I assume is bed. Feeling the comforts of the soft bed underneath me, I flinch hard as Sean's hands search my chest cavity.

Carefully pushing them away, I slowly sit up in bed when those same hands find my sides once more. "Sang what do you need?" Sean whispers his lips grazing the skin of my neck as he places a single kiss just under my ear.

"To forget." I murmur the guilt a large pit in my stomach. Ducking my head down, I slowly slide out of the bed and move to the doorway.

"Miss. Sang... please don't block us out." Owen whispers his normally strong voice quiet. Pausing, I nod and manage a small smile.

"I know."

Slipping out of the room, I carefully run my hand against the walls trying to make my way back to the living room but pause when the scent of the ocean catches in my chest and I freeze. Would he even want to see me? I was the cause of all this. I was the cause of his injuries. 

But before I have the chance to move away the door opens and large arms wrap tightly around me drawing me into a tight embrace. "Don't walk away." His voice is soft as he gathers me up into his arms. "Don't walk away from me... from us. This isn't your fault." Silas's rough greek accent is clear in his voice as he tries to hold back his emotions. 

Letting out yet another sob, I tuck my face into the crook of his neck grabbing onto him tightly.